


Invincible

by Aevintyr



Series: Invincible [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Dark, M/M, Major Illness, Mildly Dubious Consent, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-08-19
Packaged: 2018-03-30 23:20:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3955750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aevintyr/pseuds/Aevintyr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the aftermath of the damage wrecked by Ultron, the new security service HAMMER starts to crack down on perceived threats. Tony Stark is sick of it all. With everything turned upside down, he decides to trust the God of Lies … Well, it made sense at the time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The fic is set after Age of Ultron (yes, there will be spoilers) and is firmly rooted in the MCU, but the basic story line is inspired by Matt Fraction's run on Invincible Iron Man, in particular World’s Most Wanted, and assorted things Osborn is involved in. Mind the tags. There’s a more detailed (thus spoiler-y) list of warnings in the chapter end notes, but let me say upfront that no “major” archive warnings apply.

_So tear me open, pour me out_

_There’s things inside that scream and shout_

_And the pain still hates me_

_So hold me, until it sleeps_

Metallica

 

#

 

Tony could barely see through the snowstorm battering his windshield, but that black SUV could only belong to one organization. Right on schedule, too.

With one fleeting glance at the rearview mirror, he asked himself what he was doing here, again. Seemed like he still hadn’t run out of bad ideas. With a final sigh, he pulled his car up, right into the path of the armored SUV.

It screeched to a halt, so there was that.

One of the HAMMER agents actually pulled his window down, leaned out and started to shout abuse while waving his gun around. That wouldn’t have happened with SHIELD. Tony rolled his eyes before getting out of his car and shooting the man.

It had the desired effect - other agents came pouring out of the vehicle. Three more, from the front. Not bad for an escort.

“Is that Tony Stark?” one of them shouted. They exchanged confused looks.

“Yep.” Tony shot them, too. The whole Mandarin episode had been useful for his gun skills, at least.

He rounded the SUV. No sounds from the inside. Fairly decent security on the door, too. Tony recognized a Stark Industries algorithm as he cracked it. That stung.

No matter now. The door swung open. Four more agents were on the floor, quite obviously dead.

“Stark?” That had come from the prisoner.

Tony fumbled around the belt of one of the dead guards for the keys and released the handcuffs. “Come on, your ride’s waiting.”

Loki Laufeyson clambered out of the SUV. He cast a glance at the dead agents on the road.

“Get in the car, will you?”

For a moment there, Loki just looked at him, confused. He arched an eyebrow that said, _are you going to kill me, too?_

Tony shrugged. _You see an Iron Man suit anywhere near? No? Then get in._

Loki did. Tony slid onto the driver’s seat, hit the gas, swerved around the bodies and sped off into the night. He only just managed to stop himself from asking Jarvis to check for HAMMER activity. Scowling, he accelerated.

He didn’t as much as glance at Loki until they hit the highway. At least it was dark, so no passing car would notice the reason for the Battle of New York sitting next to Tony Stark, because, yeah, not the kind of publicity he needed.

Loki, to his credit, knew when to keep his mouth shut. He didn’t even comment when Tony had to pull over to be violently sick in the roadside ditch.

No, Loki’s head remained against the seat and he was just staring out of the window, with passing lights illuminating his pale skin every once in a while. He looked … serene and … wait, what? Tired. He looked _tired_ , Tony thought. Who knew what HAMMER had done to him. Not that Tony cared. The bastard deserved every last bit of it.

When he finally spoke to Loki, it happened without thinking. “Can’t shapeshift, huh?”

Loki peeled his gaze away from the highway and half-turned to Tony with a look of mild bemusement. “No. At present, I cannot.”

“But you will be able to do that eventually. It’s not going to stay dark all the time.”

“I … will require some rest.”

“Okay.”

It was the last thing said for miles on end. Tony drove on, eyes ahead, without even the desire to put on music. Never mind that it was Loki sitting next to him. The guy could choke on his “why did you do this” for a while longer.

 

#

 

**Six months earlier**

 

“Is that even _legal_?” Tony blinked at Pepper, who shrugged.

“Is it legal to program an A.I. that causes billions of property damage, not to mention kills —”

“Yeah, ok, not my brightest moment, I think we settled that already, and the bots are all gone now anyway, they can’t just come and take all of Stark Industries’ assets for compensation!”

“They can, Tony.” Pepper sighed. “They _have_. They’re already shipping off the R &D department to Oscorp. Stark Industries is finished.”

Things kind of went downhill from there. They had indeed taken everything. The entire company, and most of the rest of what he owned. They had forbidden him to ever work with the Avengers again. Senator Stern’s self-satisfied grin would haunt Tony’s nightmares for a year at least.

“You’re lucky they didn’t put you in jail,” Steve said.

Tony could only muster a hoarse laugh at that.

There was a small workshop at Tony’s other New York residence, but without Jarvis, to say nothing of the sudden lack of resources, it just wasn’t the same. There were only so many times he could take apart the one Audi they had graciously left him. Or reread the endless list of names of the people that Ultron had killed, even if he tried to dull it with booze.

Maybe it wasn’t surprising that he found it harder and harder to get out of bed in the morning.

 

 

 

**Four months earlier**

 

“Have you seen that?” Pepper pointed at the screen. “Incredible.”

“Huh?” Tony looked up.

Senator Stern was on TV. Great. It only made Tony feel sick. He took a swallow of his breakfast coffee, which he’d spiked with scotch when Pepper hadn’t been looking. He still felt like throwing up, but at least his hands stopped shaking.

What was Stern up to, then? Congratulating Norman Osborn for taking the post of Director of HAMMER, the US government’s new intelligence agency.

“Wait, what? They’ve replaced Nick Fury with the CEO of Oscorp?” Tony frowned at the screen. “HAMMER? What is that supposed to even _be_?”

“They had to fill the void left by SHIELD eventually.” Pepper shrugged. “It’s not like _you_ can do anything about it.”

No, he couldn’t. But neither was there evidence of any other Avenger in the footage. Tony Stark wasn’t the only persona non grata these days.

“There have been a lot of mistakes,” Osborn was saying. “ _Superheroes_ might have a nice ring to it, but their world of zero accountability came crashing down with the Ultron Project. It is time things went through proper channels again. At the newly established HAMMER, we promise transparency. We promise responsibility. We —”

“Mute,” Tony interrupted. Osborn kept talking. No Jarvis, after all, to shut him up or make some snide remark. “Damn.”

“That about sums it up, yes.” Pepper heaved a sigh. She’d been out of a job, too, and no one would hire the ex-CEO of Stark Industries … He had destroyed her life, too. Like he sooner or later destroyed everything he touched.

“I, uh … Actually, I’m not hungry.” Tony fled from the room without waiting for a reply.

 

 

 

**Three months earlier**

 

HAMMER didn’t wait that long for their first major fuck-up. An arrest gone wrong, civilians dead, and no one really knew what the culprit (also conveniently dead) was supposed to have done.

“How are you holding up?” Steve asked, over the phone.

“Oh, you know. Alright. I think. Still not allowed to do any work, you see. What are you guys up to?”

“Nothing much,” Steve said. “Training the new team, mostly.”

Tony hung up. He sat down on the sofa, as a wave of nausea and dizziness threatened to overwhelm him. The Avengers were moving on. Without him. The most famous mass-murderer in the history of America …

“Hey, wake up! Tony, _wake up_!”

“Hmm?” He blinked up at Pepper’s panicked face. Dimly, he realized he was lying on the floor. Next to his head, scotch was seeping into the carpet from a broken tumbler. “What’s going on?”

“You tell me! I found you here, passed out! What’s _wrong_ with you, Tony?”

_Everything_ , he wanted to say. He didn’t. He even agreed to go and see a doctor, to calm Pepper down.

“Well?” she asked, when he returned from his appointment.

“I’m fine. I just … I need to work.”

He ran for the workshop before she could reach for him.

 

 

**Two months earlier**

 

Tony stared down at his plate. Why had he agreed to go out for dinner? Oh, yes. To see Pepper smile again. He looked across the table. She wasn’t smiling.

He took a deep swallow of wine, then dropped his gaze to the food. Right. He should … eat. Starters. And the main course after that, and …

Bile rose in his throat.

“Excuse me.”

He only just made it to the restroom in time. He sat on the cold tiles for a long while, shivering.

“Tony?”

He winced when Pepper put her hand on his shoulder. “Don’t touch me.”

She withdrew the hand, but not the concern from her voice. Nor indeed the hurt. “Tony, please. What is wrong with you? Talk to me! I can help.”

“No.” The coldness in his voice surprised himself. Pepper flinched. “Or wait, actually, you can. You can help me by getting the fuck away from me!”

“You don’t mean that. You’re just not feeling well. Come on, let’s go home, and sleep it over, okay?”

Tony started to laugh, he couldn’t help himself. When he caught Pepper’s disbelieving look, it only made him laugh harder. “Home? Oh yeah. I’d love to go _home_. Malibu, ring a bell? Oh, wait, that was destroyed by the Mandarin. How about Avengers Towers, then? Oh no, the Avengers kicked me out! What kind of home am I supposed to have, hm? _You_? Right, because that’s working out so well for everyone. Just … go away. Or wait, _I’ll_ go away. You can have that New York apartment, since you’re so fond of it.”

He strode out without as much as a backward glance, got into his car and drove, drove until he was out of the city, somewhere in Jersey, for fuck’s sake, before his vision swam so much he had to pull over.

 

 

**One month earlier**

 

Within a short time, HAMMER had turned New York City into some sort of dystopic nightmare. Designated as the prime magnet for troublemakers, it now was full of check-points manned by armed guards. Tony was almost glad he’d got out when he did. Though he supposed it was only a matter of time until they turned on other cities. But then, they could already read every text message, every IM, every phone call … like SHIELD had.

Tony was walking through the seedier parts of Boston, towards his safehouse. He still didn’t know what made him pick this one. Maybe the proximity to MIT, to a time when his world had been only moderately fucked-up, when his biggest worry had been to disappoint his old man. Again. Tony didn’t even want to begin contemplating what Howard Stark would have made of Ultron.

“Hey darling!” a female voice called out to him. “Looking for someone to warm your bed?”

He pulled the hood deeper over his face and hurried on, before she recognized him, took a picture and sold it to the national newspapers. Tony Stark caught soliciting sex from a prostitute, yes, definitely the kind of headline he needed. The media were full of accusations these days, fuller than before, anyway. People being arrested on flimsy pretexts and carted off to who-knew-where. Ex-SHIELD, mostly. The Avengers, or what was left of them, had gone undercover. Tony had no way to reach any of them, now.

A radio blared from a shop he passed, where Senator Stern was announcing yet another law for public safety, to be enforced by HAMMER.

Someone had to stop Osborn. But without Pepper, without Jarvis and Stark Industries, without the Avengers, what could Tony do?

 

 

**One day earlier**

 

That morning, HAMMER announced that they had captured Loki Laufeyson.

 

#

 

He parked in the garage and ushered Loki towards the elevator. For some reason, Loki let it happen. Either he was exhausted from the HAMMER ordeal, or determined not to lose any mind games. Or both. Or something else entirely. The guy was unpredictable, after all. And dangerous. Why had Tony thought this was a good idea?

They made it into the living room without incidents. Then again, they hadn’t passed any windows yet.

Tony left Loki standing in the middle of the room and turned to his bar. Certainly not as large as the one at Avengers Tower. Bad oversight. Note to self, restock bar of all safehouses … Or something. Whatever. There was some good scotch, still. Tony filled two tumblers and brought them over, handing one to Loki.

The right corner of Loki’s mouth twitched. “Is that the point of all this? Repaying your small debt to me?”

Tony sipped his scotch. It didn’t help his nausea, as such, but not drinking, as he’d found out the hard way, wasn’t a solution either. “You’re supposed to be the master tactician, you go and figure it out.”

He looked up at Loki, who met his gaze. Green eyes, Tony noted. Hm. But either way, he wasn’t about to back down now.

“You want something from me,” Loki said.

“Obviously. Go on.”

“It involves HAMMER, which has usurped the place of your SHIELD against the universe. They are dangerous and you know it. After the failure of your Ultron Program, you cannot work with the Avengers anymore. But neither can you do this alone.”

Well, shit. Say what you will about Loki, but he sure was perceptive. Tony took another sip of his scotch. “Pretty much, yeah.”

“How can you be sure I’m not using you?”

“Because I know you are. I might not know what happened to you at HAMMER, or why you’re on Earth in the first place, but I’m damn sure you’ve got plenty of motive to get back at them, and you can’t do this by yourself either. So, yeah, damn straight you’re using me. But so am I. Using you.”

Loki nipped at his scotch. It seemed to meet his approval, because he took a deeper swallow next. “Despite everything that has been done to _you_ , you would still fight for this realm? Not only that, but you would make a deal with the devil?”

Another shrug from Tony. “I’ve been called that myself a couple of times, you know, Ultron, and all that. So who is to say it’s not _you_ who’s making a bad deal here?”

Loki … grinned. “I suppose we shall have to find out. Very well, Stark. Let us take down HAMMER together.”

He offered his hand. Right. Tony hadn’t voluntarily touched anyone recently, not since … Shit. He was making a deal, here. The chance to do something good, before … He took the hand. Loki’s cool, long fingers wrapped around his in a firm handshake.

Tony sucked in a breath. “Yeah. Let’s … take down HAMMER.”

Thankfully, Loki let go. And so it was settled.

Now that the adrenaline had worn off, and the immediate was dealt with, fatigue rolled over Tony and made him all but collapse on the sofa.

“Okay, so this is my safehouse. Bathroom’s down the hall, I think there’s some frozen pizza left in the fridge and that door leads to the guest room if you want to, erm, rest.” He sighed. “Look, I’ll be honest, this has kind of been a long day for me, tracking down HAMMER. Can we do the entire planning thing tomorrow?”

“Certainly.” Loki downed the rest of his scotch. “I have all the time in the world.”

Tony frowned. Simple turn of phrase, or did Loki _know_ … No. He couldn’t think about that. Couldn’t deal with that, not now. “Good,” he mumbled, before dragging himself off to his bedroom.

 

#

 

A hand was caressing his shoulder. Tony froze. _No_. No one was allowed to touch him. If anyone touched him, they would know —

He tried to get away, crawling forwards, slowly, too slowly …

“Tony,” a voice whispered.

Pepper. Oh, no. He closed his eyes.

“How dare you leave like that.”

“I’m sorry,” he whined. “Oh Pepper, I’m so, so sorry, I —”

The hand returned to his shoulder. He wanted to recoil, but forced himself not to. Forced himself to open his eyes, too.

Pepper was leaning above him. But they were in the New York apartment. That couldn’t be right. Could it? Outside, the sun was shining. But it wasn’t summer. Was it? He felt dizzy. That, at least, had become familiar.

“Tony …”

Her hand wandered across his chest and he wanted to hide, to run, but he couldn’t. All he could do was watch as Pepper’s face turned into a grimace.

“What is _that_? That is _disgusting_ , get away from me, you sick —”

“Stop.” Tony felt like screaming, but he could only muster a whisper. “Don’t you see, I wanted to keep you safe from all this, I only wanted …”

Pepper backed away from him in horror, the one sight he had never wanted to see again, please, he knew it was his fault, _everything_ was his fault, but _please_ —

 

#

 

Tony jerked awake. In Boston, in winter. He could hear sounds from the kitchen. For a moment, it confused him, before the last day came rushing back. Loki. Shit, that was _Loki_ in his kitchen.

He clearly hadn’t thought this through. Apart from his guest being an insane mass murderer, there hadn’t been anyone in Tony’s living space ever since Pepper … He swallowed. Better focus on practical things. Such as, getting out of bed. In the past weeks, Tony had just put it off for as long as possible, with no work and no girlfriend, but now there was … Loki. Sure.

A glance at the bedside table told him it was already past noon. He really had to get up. How else was he going to have his revenge on Osborn?

That thought finally drove him out of bed. With the support of the wall, he managed to make his way over to his bathroom. Splashing cold water in his face helped somewhat.

When he eventually made it into the kitchen, a well-rested Loki and a pile of buttered toasts were waiting for him.

“Uhm.” Tony cleared his throat. “I kind of overslept.”

Loki shrugged. “I suppose we could still call this breakfast.”

“Or brunch. You know. People around here love it. Combination of breakfast and lunch. Brunch. Easy.”

“Very well. Brunch, then.”

Either way, it meant food. Tony’s stomach churned at the idea. “I’m not all that hungry, though.”

Wait, why had he said that? Now there’d be stupid questions and …

Loki crooked his head. “So you are not only saving the world, you’re doing it on an empty stomach? I’m impressed, Stark. Asgard would not stand a chance against you.”

In spite of himself, Tony laughed. Besides, he couldn’t argue the fact that he needed sustenance. He just hoped he could keep it down.

For the moment, though, it seemed that he could. He looked across the table at Loki. “So, how about taking down HAMMER?”

“And I thought you’d never ask.” Loki grinned. “Well, this is your realm, is it not? What does Osborn want, exactly?”

Tony tried a sip of coffee, but quickly discarded the notion. “What does anybody ever want? To rule the world, I guess.”

A low chuckle from Loki. “It’s rarely that simple. Do you have an inside source in his organization yet?”

“Nope. The whole idea of taking them down only became a real possibility when you turned up here, you know. Should’ve given me a heads-up.”

“Perhaps I will, next time.” Loki winked.

Okay. That … Tony would just have to put that down to Loki being Loki. He probably talked that way to everybody. It wasn’t as if the two of them knew each other.

“Well,” Loki said, “I suppose I could do it, when I am capable of complex spells again. But someone with real, appropriate credentials might be more convenient for the time being.”

So he wasn’t at the full heights of his power? And he’d admitted it? Interesting. It begged the question of how he’d wound up on Earth in the first place, but if Tony asked, that would be tantamount to losing, wouldn’t it?

“Credentials. Sure. Well, the Avengers are out, but … Actually, I know just the person. Let me make a quick call.”

 

#

 

Maria Hill drove in a simmering rage. It was bad enough that she’d had to spend a year at Stark Industries, hiding behind their army of lawyers, officially working for Stark. But now that his company was gone and his reputation finally in well-deserved tatters, he still managed to be the bane of her existence. He hadn’t even specified why he needed to see her, in Boston, right now, beyond “matters of national security.”

She had considered refusing. But then, Stark had a tendency to attract real threats to national security, and despite all the tasteless jokes, the exasperating ego-trips and _Ultron_ , Maria could not forget how he’d flown that missile into the wormhole above New York.

So here she was, on the highway. As the skyline of Boston appeared on the horizon, she wondered whether Stark knew that she had advised against taking him on as a consultant back in the days, and whether it still mattered, and what if … With a sigh, she drove on.

 

#

 

The safehouse was great. Maria had to concede that. SHIELD could not have set it up better. She called ahead to Stark, but when he didn’t answer, she simply let herself in. Gun at the ready, just in case.

“Hello, Hill.” Lights flickered on in the narrow hallway. Stark was leaning against the doorframe, grinning as per usual. But … was it a trick of lighting or had he lost some weight and color? Well, recent times had been hard on him, deserved or not. “Glad you found this place okay. I’ll need your gun though.”

He didn’t trust her. Fair enough. Feeling was mutual. But still, she couldn’t argue with handing over the gun. All Iron Man suits had been confiscated, she recalled, and without those, Stark was no match for her with or without weapons. He had to know that, so why …? She put the gun on the dresser next to the door.

“And your back-up.” Stark was enjoying this. That made one of them.

She dislodged the second gun from her ankle and put it down on the dresser as well.

“And any other weapons.” A knife followed. “Cool. Anything else? A nail file, maybe?”

Maria glared. “Tell me you didn’t call me all the way out here because you needed someone to laugh at your sick comedy act.”

It sobered Stark up. “No, we actually do have a problem with national security. Well, several. But one in particular, in that it currently _is_ our national security.”

“HAMMER?”

Stark nodded. “They’re dangerous and you know it. SHIELD was bad enough,” Maria rolled her eyes, but after the entire Hydra fuck-up, she couldn’t exactly argue, “but now there’s every politician’s best buddy Norman Osborn making the laws.”

“And leeching of Stark Industries assets.”

“Yeah. But that’s not the only reason I’m doing this. I think he needs to be stopped. And I think you agree.”

As a matter of fact, she did, but she wouldn’t say so before Stark showed her his hand.

“Well, are we going to do this in the hallway?” she asked.

“Oh, of course, do come in.” Stark pushed himself off the doorframe and led her into a spacious living room. “Take a seat. I think we’ll have coffee and some food in a moment.”

We? That could be referring to the two of them. Or had Stark asked someone else to join his crusade? Pepper? Probably not, judging by the expression on her face the last time Maria had met her and casually asked about Stark. Who knew what had happened _there_. Another Avenger? They had all gone off the grid. Someone else, then, but who? Was that why he’d wanted her weapons? The unease hovering in the back of her mind came to the fore.

“Hey, Hill?” He had settled down on the sofa and was grinning in his ‘something is going to happen that I will find really funny and you really won’t’ way. Damn him. “Whatever happens next, don’t freak out.”

“I don’t think there’s any —”

The words died in her mouth as none other than Loki Laufeyson walked into the living room with a tray of coffee cups and some … sandwiches? Maria blinked. Her right hand reached for her gun on auto-pilot, but of course came up empty. Shit. _Loki_? He’d turned up on Earth again and HAMMER had captured him, but there’d been rumors he might have escaped … The picture assembled itself in Maria’s mind. Stark. He’d sprung Loki from custody. They were working together. Loki might have him under some kind of spell. Shit, shit, _shit_. She needed to get out of here, she needed a weapon, she needed —

Stark was talking. To Loki. “Well, I got us someone with the right credentials. What was step two?”

“You’re asking me, on your turf?” Loki grinned. He didn’t pay any attention to Maria. “I’m at a disadvantage here. I seem to have mislaid the scepter.”

“Oh, that?” Stark shrugged. “Hydra stole it to create supersoldiers and Ultron … he might have used it as a toothpick for all I know. HAMMER took the rest in, I think, but the mind stone is gone.”

“How unfortunate. We should look into that nevertheless, once we have our mole in place.”

“Absolutely. Hill. You in?”

Maria blinked. She’d found herself in some pretty bizarre situations over the years, but … “You have got to be kidding me.”

“Nope, not really.” Stark threw her a glance that might, with a bit of goodwill and squinting, be considered apologetic. “The Avengers are scattered, Osborn is going after SHIELD agents, and the world, so we really need solid intel and I’m fairly sure he wouldn’t pass over the opportunity to get Fury’s second-in-command under his wing.”

“ _Fairly_ sure,” Maria echoed. She had, however, considered approaching HAMMER herself, for that very reason. The lack of reliable outside contacts had stopped her. Fury was entirely off the grid at the moment. And now, she had … Stark and Loki. In other words, the epitome of reliability. “And anyway, what is he doing here?”

“Currently,” Loki interrupted, “I’m enjoying my dinner. More generally, I am assisting Stark in his endeavors to stop HAMMER. Do help yourself to some sandwiches, Agent Hill.”

Absolutely not. They might be poisoned.

“Oh, come on.” Stark rolled his eyes and bit into one sandwich himself. “If he wanted to kill you, you’d be dead already.”

Unfortunately, Maria couldn’t argue with that. She took a sandwich. Roast beef. Okay. She had a dubious nibble, but it actually tasted quite good. But there was still the issue of this being Loki. “Why are you helping Stark?”

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Stark frowning. Not a question he’d asked, apparently. Did he have a death wish or something?

Loki, however, was unperturbed. “We agreed to a mutually beneficial arrangement.”

Right. That … could mean anything. If she asked again, he’d only obfuscate the issue further. This was great. Just … great.

“You are aware that you are a war criminal,” she had to point out.

“So am I,” Stark intervened. “Which is precisely why we can do this. Because no one expects us to.”

In some insane, Stark way, he had a point. Well. What options did Maria have? She could go along with it, just for the time being. Getting close to HAMMER and collecting intel couldn’t hurt (alright, it _could_ , but it wouldn’t kill her. Probably). And when this … arrangement inevitably went south, she could always extract at a moment’s notice.

“Alright,” she concluded. “I’ll get into HAMMER.”

 

#

 

Hill didn’t leave a second too early. When the door had closed behind her, Tony leaned back against the cushions and took a few deep breaths in vain hopes of fighting down the nausea. He needed to eat, he knew that. The sandwich had even tasted alright and why couldn’t he keep _anything_ down anymore, this wasn’t supposed —

“Stark?”

“I …” Tony cleared his throat. _Don’t be sick on the floor, for fuck’s sake._ “I just need a minute here.”

No further comment from Loki, but as soon as Tony had a grip on himself again, there’d be valid questions and he wanted to curl up somewhere and hide away for … Right.

It took him a long while to sit up straight and open his eyes again. Loki was still on the sofa, legs drawn up, and … reading some paperback novel. Tony blinked, but the absurdity of the scene didn’t disappear. Was he hallucinating on top of everything else? Time for scotch, then …

Loki looked up when he noticed the stare. “So, Agent Hill? She strikes me as fairly capable.”

No questions about Tony’s little episode? Really? He released a breath he’d only just realized he’d been holding. He felt so relieved it was beyond pathetic. “Yeah. She’s really good at what she does. Never liked me much, but she’s a top-notch professional. Some team we make, eh?”

He was rambling. This was going to be such a spectacular catastrophe.

“Mhmm. What is it you say on your realm, Stark? Misery acquaints a man with strange bedfellows?”

Tony grinned by default. Best not think about that turn of phrase too much, and definitely not show any sort of interest in — “Why, are you offering?”

It got weirder when Loki grinned back. “Are you considering it?”

Uhm … no? Taking down evil organizations was one thing, but this certainly didn’t involve … Tony looked at Loki, unable to help himself. Not a bad view, was all. And though he hated to admit it, it had been a while since someone had touched him, too long in other words, while life was short and … _No_.

“You go on and wonder about that.”

Not the best comeback Tony had ever thought of, but it gave him sufficient opportunity to leave.

 

#

 

The next morning, when Tony looked into the mirror, he detected a tinge of yellow in the white of his eyes. He stopped himself from smashing the mirror to pieces, but only just.

It took him forever to make himself leave the bathroom, though. He knew this wasn’t getting any less suspicious with every minute he spent sitting on the cold tiles, and the jaundice wasn’t going to disappear, but …

He hauled himself up. Maybe Loki would continue to oblige him by ignoring it, like he had with all previous signs of illness.

“Stark?” his voice called from the living room.

Bile rose in Tony’s throat. He couldn’t go and face Loki, or Hill, or anyone, ever again. Not when his eyes and his body and … fuck. He fled to his room.

 

#

 

He lay curled up on his bed, trying not to think and failing miserably.

The door opened without warning. Tony squeezed his eyes shut. _Go away, please leave me alone._

“Are you done playing hide-and-seek?” Loki asked. There were steps on the floor as he came closer. “I can still see you, you know. Hey. Stark. I’m _talking_ to you.”

“Good for you,” Tony mumbled.

“I’m not going away.”

“Until …?”

“I’m just … not.”

What? Tony frowned and peered up at Loki before he could stop himself. Damnit.

“Ah,” Loki said.

Tony glared. Might as well, now. “Oh, fuck off, it’s not like I wasn’t obviously sick before, what is it with you, do you get some kick out of this, watching me try to … to come to terms …” He trailed off, horrified with himself.

Loki ignored the outburst, but he did come closer, leaned over the bed and trailed a hand down Tony’s chest.

“No! Stop! _Please, stop touching me_.”

The hand did stop, as a matter of fact. Right over Tony’s liver. _No_. Loki frowned. He applied more pressure to his touch, it tingled with … something, magic probably, it was cold and painful and Tony wanted it to _stop_ , he wanted to _run_ , before …

“I see,” Loki said.

Tony swallowed hard. He couldn’t tell anybody. He _couldn’t_. Loki’s hand was still there above the liver, searching, and Tony was going to be sick any moment now.

“It’s none of your business!” He scrambled out of bed and ran for the door.

 

#

 

He wandered around Boston after that, first until the nausea abated, then on and on, hood pulled deep over his face, trying not to think, especially not about the edge in Loki’s voice. _I see_.

A group of MIT students walked past, discussing their engineering class, laughing. Tony wanted to hit something, or march into HAMMER’s headquarters guns blazing, he wanted to push Loki up against that wall and kiss him until they forgot their names and their history, he wanted his workshop back to tinker with his suits and invent something outrageous, he wanted to call Pepper, or Rhodey, or Steve, he wanted …

He wanted to _live_.

The realization hit him with the subtle force of a repulsor beam. He staggered into the nearest back alley, leaned against a wall for support and couldn’t stop himself from sliding down, until he was sitting on wet, dirty pavement, hugging his knees, but he wasn’t going to cry, he _wasn’t_ …

“Stark.”

He peered up with bleary eyes. Woah. If not for the voice, it would have taken him a moment to identify this person in jeans and a fucking Red Sox cap as _Loki_. Despite everything, laughter bubbled up Tony’s throat. It made him sick again.

“What,” he managed.

“Let’s get you back, hm?” Loki said, as if he were talking about the weather. Which he might have been. It was snowing, Tony realized.

“I …” He tried to stand, but releasing his knees was as far as he got. His hands fell to his side, into the dirt.

“Tony. Get _up_.”

When he didn’t react, Loki reached down and hauled him upright. Magic tingled down his spine and somehow, he didn’t feel as wet and cold anymore. Peering down at himself, Tony noticed that his hoodie had been transformed into a neatly tailored burgundy winter coat. It was dry. And warm. Hm.

“Come along,” Loki said. “One step at a time.”

Tony had no idea how far they were from the safehouse, but he didn’t want to think about that. He didn’t want to think, period. He just leaned on the body next to him and focused on his steps. One at a time. One at a time …

 

#

 

By the time they reached the apartment, Tony was ready to keel over and have done with it, right then and there. Loki, however, had other plans. He sat Tony down on the sofa and busied himself with lighting the fireplace. Hm. Warmth.

When Tony still hadn’t moved by the time the fire was blazing, Loki heaved a sigh and proceeded to do drag the coat off himself.

Tony slept.

 

#

 

When he woke up, it was dark outside. The fire was slowly dying just inside his view. Idly, he wondered why no more wood had been put in, when he realized that his head wasn’t resting on a cushion or anything, it was resting on Loki’s thigh. Tony sat up with a start.

Loki looked at him in the low lights, but without discernible contempt. Without any discernible anything, really.

“Uhm …” Tony tried.

Without inflection, Loki asked, “How long do you have?”

Tony slumped against the cushions. “As of today? Six months. Give or take.”

“Who else knows?”

“The doctor. I forgot her name.”

“Tony.”

“Just you.”

There was a small sound from Loki, a gasp maybe, so low that Tony might have imagined it.

Maybe that did it, but the words came tumbling out before he could stop himself, “It’s cancer. Stage 4 liver cancer. Terminal, in other words. It’s inoperable thanks to the long-term alcohol damage in my liver and now it’s spreading and I’m … I’m dying. Oh, shit, I really am, this time, aren’t I? I’m going to _die_.”

He’d said it out loud. It was real now. It was really happening. It was …

Something touched his right hand. Tony flinched. “Why are you still touching me? How can you _touch me_ when there are these … these _things_ inside of me!”

“I can feel the cancer,” Loki said, eyes downcast. But he didn’t let go. “It’s killing you. But you are _not_ your disease. You, you are Tony Stark and _you don’t give up_.”

“Hey, I don’t know what they teach you about stage 4 cancer on Asgard, but for us measly mortals, that means —”

Loki kissed him. Okay. Well, maybe “kiss” was overstating things, more like “resting their lips against each other.” Deep down, something stirred, something like desire and want and _need_ , something starved of human contact, trying to battle its way past the cancer cells, Tony _wanted_ , but he _couldn’t_ , not like this, but there’d never be another way again and his time was running out, six months (give or take), he had to get _away_ , but couldn’t find the strength to do that either, he …

“I can’t,” he slurred, “I’m sorry, but I can’t. I just …” A strong arm pulled him against a chest. Loki. A hand was caressing his back in gentle patterns. “I’m … scared. I don’t want to die alone, fuck, I’m _so scared_.”

And there it was. Tony hadn’t even admitted that to himself. He felt … not better, as such. But relieved. In an odd way.

“You’re not alone,” Loki said, voice impossibly soft.

Tony wanted to say something else, but his voice choked on tears.

 

#

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings (beware of spoilers): instead of the brain damage in World’s Most Wanted, what Tony has to deal with here is advanced liver cancer with a range of symptoms (not too graphically, but there will be some throwing up, loss of appetite and therefore not eating properly, weight loss, jaundice, fainting spells, dizziness, fever and fatigue). Also: thoughts and discussions about terminal illness, death and dying (he’s not going to die though). He’ll have to deal with his alcoholism in some detail as well. There’s some dub-con if you squint, though Tony might not agree, and consent is definitely discussed. I hope that covers it? It’s a pretty dark one, this.


	2. Chapter 2

Maria spent an hour scouting HAMMER’s headquarters without being spotted. “Ridiculous” did not even begin to cover it. She contemplated her options, but in the end, subtle was never going to work for this organization. HAMMER. Seriously.

So what she did was march into the front entrance, right up to security.

“Agent Maria Hill, here to see Norman Osborn.”

The guy behind the scanner blinked at her. She counted in her head. Thirty seconds, and still no one had trained a weapon on her. Pathetic.

“I …” the guy stammered. “I have to make a call.”

“Be my guest.”

He tried to operate the speed-dial system of his earpiece. By the looks of it, this took him three attempts.

“Are you …?” a female voice asked from Maria’s other side.

“Really?” she asked back, remembering the pictures of SHIELD’s most wanted, so ubiquitous some of them still haunted her. Loki, for one. Oh, this was such a splendid idea.

An armed security guard arrived. “Follow me, please, Agent Hill.”

She did, through the security check and down various nondescript corridors. Government agencies, eh. The guard didn’t check her for weapons. Misguided courtesy or sheer stupidity. Maria wasn’t sure which she found more offensive.

The journey ended in some sort of workshop. It rose about three floors into the open, with little workstations everywhere, dozens of engineers and scientists at work. Stark would love this.

“Here she is, boss,” the guard said.

That was how Maria found herself face-to-face with Norman Osborn for the first time, a man in his mid-sixties maybe, tailored pinstripe suit, face-lift, fake magnanimous smile. He reminded her vaguely of Pierce.

“Agent Hill! What brings you here?”

She shrugged. “You’re short on staff. I happen to be available.”

Osborn threw his head back and laughed. It made her skin crawl.

“Very good, Maria - may I call you Maria? - very good indeed. I was rather hoping you would pick the winning side sooner or later.”

She merely smiled. After the fall of SHIELD, many people had wanted to see her in jail, but she’d been offered a job or two behind the senators’ backs. So they had gambled right. Osborn couldn’t resist.

“This …” Osborn pointed to the table next to her, where lots of small black devices were laid out. “This is our latest project. Surveillance drones. Neat, aren’t they? We will have them in the air all across America soon.”

“Fascinating.” Slimy, pathetic show-off.

“Now, if I could interest you in some of our more advanced weaponry …”

“You read my mind.”

When Osborn wasn’t looking, Maria slipped one of the drones into her bag. Stark would want to take a look at this.

 

#

 

Tony woke up in his bed, still tired and confused. There’d been something about yesterday, a back alley and Loki’s voice and Loki’s touch and … Loki _knew_.

Shit. Tony pulled the covers above his head and tried to go back to sleep. He was tired, so that made sense, only he was restless, too, but having to go out there and face … Maybe Loki had gone away. After that display last night, who could blame him?

So Tony dragged himself out of his room. It took more effort than he would have liked. When had he last eaten anything he’d been able to keep down? At this rate, six months was beginning to look optimistic. His view went out of focus. He gripped the doorframe for support.

_I don’t want to die alone._

“Tony?”

Loki was still there. On the sofa, reading that paperback novel. The blink of an eye later, there was a hand on Tony’s left arm, steadying him. They were past embarrassment now, weren’t they? So he let Loki half-guide, half-carry him, sit him down and fetch him a glass of water. He was almost being … nice.

Hysterical laughter threatened to overtake Tony. “What the fuck are you even doing?”

“I owe you an apology.”

“What?” Tony frowned at Loki, who’d settled down on the sofa as well, but at a respectable distance. “If this is about New York, that’s a bit late, don’t you think?”

“Yesterday, you told me to stop. I did not. I offer no excuse.”

“Oh.” Tony had forgotten about that. His own words came back to him then, quivering and pleading. But … had Loki just handed him ammunition? “You know what, I think it’s _me_ who needed to stop. Stop lying to myself, I guess. So … yeah. I’ll give it a pass. On one condition. You tell me what you’re doing on Earth. Why you were with HAMMER in the first place. And why you’re still _here_.”

Loki gave him a long, evaluating look. “Very well. I trust you are familiar with the circumstances surrounding Malekith and the Aether?”

In as much as Thor had told them, yeah. Tony nodded. “Crazy old story came to life and took Greenwich apart. And you …” He trailed off.

“Died?”

Tony swallowed hard.

“Asgard fell into chaos when Thor abdicated the throne. Something had to be done.”

In spite of himself, Tony had to ask, “So what did you do, try and usurp the throne?”

“Well, yes.” Loki looked bemused.

Tony chuckled. That felt good. “I’m guessing Odin wasn’t happy when he found out.”

“No. Not exactly. And since trying to hold me to justice on Asgard has not worked, he sent me to Midgard, with the barest minimum of magic I require to survive, and into the hands of what he thought a recognized authority.”

“HAMMER.”

“Precisely. That is when you entered the scene. For which I am grateful. I would have wasted precious magic otherwise.”

“So basically you’re using me as provider of shelter and food until your magic batteries are recharged and you can go back to Asgard for that throne you like so much?”

Loki gave him a small smile. “I am ‘recharging’ my ‘batteries,’ as it were, yes. But … I am not going back to Asgard.”

“No, instead you’re watching one of your enemies die.” The vitriol in Tony’s voice had appeared out of nowhere. “Fun times, I agree. If our roles were reversed, I’d probably get a kick out of this, too.”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Loki said, his voice calm and controlled. “And neither do I.”

“Then why are you still here? Just how screwed is your magic, eh?”

“It is far from recovered. But that’s beside the point.”

“What _is_ the point, then?”

Before Loki could reply, there was a tapping sound on the window. Something small and black that Tony couldn’t make out.

Loki walked over to the window. “It appears to be a HAMMER surveillance drone. Courtesy of Maria Hill, according to a small note.”

“Okay, then, let it in, I guess?”

The drone zoomed into the room and hovered in mid-air.

“This is your area, is it not?” Loki asked.

Tony hadn’t tinkered with as much as a toaster for ages and … He got up, half in trance, and caught the drone in his right hand.

 

#

 

He had no idea how much time passed until he knew he’d learned everything about the state of HAMMER’s technology and how much they’d managed to understand of Stark Industries patents. When he looked up, Loki was standing there, in the kitchen door, watching.

“You know what?” Tony sighed. “This was the most fun thing I’ve done in _months_. That … that’s pathetic.”

Loki crooked his head and regarded Tony for a less-than-comfortable moment, before he sat down on the other side of the kitchen table. It was covered with various machine parts, Tony realized. Hydraulic fluid, too. On the kitchen table. They ate off that table. Or tried to eat, in his case. Either way, judging from the spotless state Loki had always left the kitchen in, he was probably some serious neat freak.

“Uhm,” Tony said. “So this is kind of a mess, hang on, I’ll clean it up.” He reached for the hull of the drone and tried not to think of all the steps of actual cleaning he’d have to go through now, that involved getting up and moving around and …

“Wait. While you have all this laid out … why don’t you tell me how it works.”

“What?” Tony put the hull down again, confused.

“The drone.” Loki gestured at the table. When he looked up, there seemed to be actual curiosity in his eyes. “How does it work? And how would you make it work better?”

“That, uhm … That might take a while.”

Loki smiled. It lit up his entire face and Tony’s breath caught and _shit_. “It just so happens I have a little time on my hands.”

Right. Tony had to start considering the possibility that Loki was for real. That he actually wanted to have this explained to him. Even though he had to know that asking Tony to talk tech was a slippery slope towards long-winded enthusiastic ranting. He _had_ to know …

“Okay,” Tony looked at the disassembled drone, at a sudden loss of where to start and what to say in the first place. He took a deep breath. “So, erm, this is the hull. Obviously. I mean …” But Loki didn’t look annoyed or bored. He looked … interested. “Okay, so how about we start with the power source …”

 

#

 

During the next day, Maria continued familiarizing herself with the state of affairs at HAMMER. Predictably enough, the real focus was on chemicals, this being the organization of the CEO of Oscorp. No word on him stepping down from that position yet.

The agents he’d managed to recruit so far, if they weren’t ex-SHIELD that had tried to avoid Stark Industries (a feeling she could emphasize with), looked like employees of his company too. The science division, then, was up to scratch.

Most of R&D was caught up in making sense of Stark’s patents. They’d even appropriated his prized repulsor tech and the arc reactor. The way they were drooling over those designs made Maria feel appalled on Stark’s behalf.

“Oh, you know,” a male voice said behind her, obviously wanting to be overheard. “Another of Fury’s dirty little secrets.”

She ignored it, best as she could. Those idiots would never stop knowing everything that went wrong with SHIELD, most of it Fury’s personal fault.

“The things he got up to,” the voice continued. Maria recognized it, now. Ex-SHIELD, too. “I mean, you should have seen that retreat, Banner built it, you know, and they used it for —”

Maria sighed and turned around. “Really, Agent Walker? Do we need to go into Cambodia as well?”

He paled and walked away, muttering under his breath.

Just as Maria was about to make her way back to the observation deck which, it had to be admitted, has a rather spectacular view of New York City, her com chimed.

“Agent Hill?” Osborn said.

“Yes?”

“Emergence meeting, now.”

“About what?”

“Tony Stark. I want him dealt with.”

 

#

 

Once again, Maria wasn’t in the best mood as her car pulled into Boston. Yes, HAMMER needed to be taken down and no, Stark couldn’t do it by himself, let alone go undercover, but seriously? Just what was the arrogant bastard doing while she had to deal with Norman Osborn day in, day out?

Inside the apartment, a voice could be heard from the bathroom. Loki. He was talking softly, too low for Maria to make out the words. Stark groaned. Shit. What was she about to walk in on here? Working with Loki was bad enough, and she wouldn’t put anything past Tony Stark, but … _seriously_?

She stayed in the hallway, hugging the wall, and peered into the living room. While she was still debating whether it was a blessing or a curse that Stark preferred open spaces, the two men emerged from the bathroom.

Maria sucked in a breath before she could stop herself. Stark looked like _hell_. His face was ashen, in a yellow-ish way. Even his eyes looked jaundiced. Trouble with his liver? Well, given the amount of alcohol he consumed … He had to lean heavily on Loki for the short walk to the sofa. His Metallica shirt hung loosely on his narrow frame. He’d lost even more weight since the last time they’d met.

And what about Loki? Well. He had a secure, but gentle grip on Stark as he maneuvered him down. He headed over to the kitchen while Stark just lay there, slumped back against the cushions, eyes closed. Before long, Loki returned with a glass of water.

“Tony.”

It took Stark considerable effort to even look up. “Just going to throw it back up anyway.”

“You’re dehydrated. _Drink_.”

“At least get me some scotch.”

Loki rolled his eyes. “That you would throw back up.”

Stark, for lack of a better word, whined. Not that Loki was having any of that. He sat down on the sofa himself and proceeded to instil the water, one painful sip at a time. When the glass was half-empty, Stark curled in on himself and rested his head on Loki’s thigh. There was a soft gasp that could have come from either man.

“I …” Stark shuddered. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“Shhh.” Loki threaded his fingers into Stark’s hair. “I’m working on it. Rest.”

There was a reply, but Maria couldn’t make it out. Loki caressed Stark’s head until the breathing evened out. Only then did Loki look up, straight at where she was hiding. Shit. He didn’t, however, seem angry. He merely beckoned her closer with his free hand, leaving her no choice but to step forward into the living room.

“I would appreciate it if we could conduct this quietly,” Loki whispered. “I would be loath to wake Tony.”

“Uhm …” Maria didn’t know what to do with herself, standing in the middle of the room, so she sat down in one of the armchairs. Her eyes went back to Stark. “What’s wrong with him?”

“He’s dying.”

“ _What_?” Loki threw her a lethal glare for that outburst, but Stark didn’t stir. Maria lowered her voice again. “I mean … how?” Stark was a … a fixture somehow, an annoying, erratic fixture maybe, but a fixture nevertheless, strong and immovable, Stark couldn’t be _dying_. Could he?

“Let that be my concern. How are things at HAMMER?”

“Osborn …” She glanced at Stark again. He looked peaceful, like this. She cleared her throat. “Osborn declared Stark a fugitive. It’s HAMMER’s number one priority. There’s going to be a manhunt.”

 

#

 

When Tony woke up the next time, it was day. He thought. Maybe the lights were on. Where was he, anyway? He tried to discern his surroundings, without much success. He felt bone tired. Hadn’t he spent most of the past 48 hours asleep? Damn it. Damn cancer. Damn everything.

“Tony?” Loki’s voice hovered in from the left.

“Mhmmm. I’m awake. I think.”

An outstretched hand appeared at the edge of his vision. Tony took it, without much strength, and let himself be helped upright. There’d been something about yesterday … Someone … “What about Hill?”

“She’s next door.”

“Oh.” Tony leaned back in the cushions. “What’s Osborn up to, then?”

“Nothing good. You must eat.”

His stomach churned. “No.”

“You will require your strength.”

“Don’t have any left.” Tony wanted to curl up and go back to sleep. What was the point of eating. Why was he bothered about Osborn, anyway. It’s not like he would get his company back, and even if he did, he wouldn’t exactly go and enjoy it for long now, would he.

“Tony,” Loki snapped. The tone drew him up short. “Osborn is initiating a manhunt. We will have to leave soon.”

“Don’t care. I’m dying, remember?”

“Not yet.”

Whatever. In the end, it was less hassle to give in and let himself be hauled along.

 

#

 

When Maria entered the kitchen, Stark was sitting up and munching on toast. He looked better than last night, though that was not a high benchmark. Definitely jaundiced, she noted when he peered up at her, and the look in his eyes … She tried her best not to flinch, or stare. Stark wouldn’t appreciate it, and with good reason. The last thing she’d want in his situation was pity.

“Morning,” she ventured.

There was a third place set at the table, and Loki was just filling the cup with coffee. This time, Maria had a harder time trying to stop staring. In a way, yes, she knew that this was the snarling maniac that had taunted Natasha and fucked up Barton and destroyed New York City, but …

“Morning,” Stark said. “Sorry I wasn’t really awake when you arrived.”

“That’s alright,” she managed.

“Good of you to join us, Agent Hill,” Loki intervened, but he was smiling. “Do take a seat. I have a proposal to put to you about buying some time from HAMMER.”

 She frowned. “Osborn is not going to ease up on this.”

 “He will if Tony is dead.”

 It made her flinch, and even Stark summoned the strength to glare. “Well,” he said, “in that case you’ll only have to wait for a few more weeks. Problem solved.”

 Ouch. Loki, to his credit, held the gaze. “You are not going to die.”

 The glare turned into a frown. “Which part of ‘terminal liver cancer’ did you not get?”

 Cancer, then. How … human.

 “ _No_ ,” Loki said, with such conviction it made Stark flinch. “I’ve called on any resource I could find, tapped any magic I could gather. You are _not_ going to die, Tony. I will _make_ you not die.”

 _But how_ , Maria wanted to ask. _And how is that going to help with Osborn_. Stark, understandably, had other priorities. He was staring at Loki, trying to process what he’d just heard. When it clicked in his brain, he drew a shuddering breath and hid his face in his hands. A broken sob escaped his lips despite his best efforts to keep it in check. Maria swallowed. She hadn’t been meant to see that.

Loki, meanwhile, moved closer and put a hand on Stark’s shoulder. _What’s it to you_ , Maria wanted to ask, but Stark just turned in his seat and leaned against Loki instead.

 

#

 

When Stark had regained his composure, they settled down to plan. Maria had to admit she was curious. By all accounts, Loki had managed to fake his own death at least twice, to a degree that even Thor had believed it. Magic, and all. This might provide her with valuable insight into his methods, for the next time he snapped and attacked Earth.

“Okay,” she said. “How do _you_ fake someone’s death? To Osborn’s satisfaction, no less? He won’t rest until he’s got a body.”

“I gathered. A body, I can provide.”

“He’ll have it DNA-tested, to make sure,” Maria said. Loki rolled his eyes as if to say, _obviously_.

“But …” Stark said. His voice was hoarse, still. “How are you going to deal with, uh, you know …”

His cancer. Even looking at him, frail and weak and yes, dying, Maria couldn’t quite believe it.

Loki cleared his throat. “As you are no doubt aware, I am capable of creating duplicates. Of myself, and things I touch. It is a delicate process, one that goes down to a cellular level. That is what I will do with you. The duplicate don’t last long, but this one won’t have to. It will die, of the concentrated cancer, or of Osborn’s gun. And you … will not.”

Huh. Maria had seen him do that, duplicate himself, and his scepter (in Stuttgart, and when he had killed Coulson …), so yes, she could believe he was capable of that. After all, magic. Stark would die, and yet, he wouldn’t … Neat.

“That …” Stark was frowning. “What?”

“Tony,” Loki snapped. “The cancer is in your liver, not your brain. Think.”

Stark flinched. Maybe it would do him some good to be reminded that Loki was … what? Impatient? Impulsive? Dangerous?

“Alright,” Maria said. “So we have a body, now we need Osborn to find it. Which means I will have to find it, and lead SCYTHE there.”

“SCYTHE?” Stark asked, dubiously.

“His version of STRIKE. I think. They’re still working on the acronyms.”

“No kidding.”

Loki chuckled. “See, Tony, his obsession with you is quite remarkable. It will be his downfall.”

The two of them looked at each other across the table. Something was going on there, but Maria didn’t want to hazard a guess. She didn’t think her sanity could take the answer.

“Right then,” Stark said. “If this duplicate me is going to be stuck with my cancer, I suppose we could just send me to the hospital. Osborn will be on to that quickly enough.”

“Or so one would hope.” Maria sighed. “I’ll help it along. If you intercept the hospital’s phone line for me. That would work better than HAMMER’s protocol.”

Stark snorted. “Of course it would.”

Arrogant bastard. But he sounded more like himself. Maria was surprised to find she felt relieved.

“What’s our time frame, then?” she asked. “The sooner this is handled, the better, judging from the way Osborn was ranting in the emergency meeting.”

Loki grimaced. “Tonight. It is a rather delicate procedure and my magic … well. Suffice it to say I shall require some rest.”

Stark was looking at him again, worried now. For his own safety, probably, but there could be more to …

Maria averted her gaze. “Fine. I’ll go scout the hospital, and think of a reason why I would be in Boston in the first place. I’ll be back in the afternoon.”

She left before she witnessed anything else she wasn’t supposed to.

 

#

 

They resettled on the sofa without talking about it, but Tony was grateful for the more comfortable seating. His mind still hadn’t processed that he might not die after all. He chewed on his lower lip, but that was too exhausting, so he just leaned against Loki. If this worked out …

“I have to tell someone.”

“You shouldn’t. In the interest of everyone’s safety.”

“I know, it’s just … Pepper.” Tony closed his eyes. “She’ll be the one to … to arrange my funeral and things ended pretty badly between us and …”

“Hm.” Loki trailed his hand down Tony’s shoulder in a perfectly absent-minded gesture, as if touching him was the most natural thing in the world. “If you love her that much, why did you push her away?”

Tony blinked. Of all the things he might have expected from Loki, that had been so far down the list he couldn’t even have conceived of it. “I, erm … Well, there is this whole dying slowly and painfully of cancer thing.”

“You didn’t want her to watch you waste away,” Loki murmured.

“Yeah … I didn’t want to _hurt_ her, not again. But I still did. I couldn’t tell her and … it was better, that way, but now that I might not be dying after all …” Fuck, this was confusing. Back in the restroom of that stupid hotel, he couldn’t have considered that there might be a way out. How could he have?

“Hmm. When we are done with HAMMER, do you wish to return to her?”

Neutral-sounding question, but oh, it stung, especially since that hand didn’t stop its caress.

“I …” Oh, Pepper. Sweet, perfect Pepper who had gone through so much trouble for him … “I probably went too far this time. I went too far so often. Even if by some miracle she wanted me back after this … I don’t think I can. I just … I can’t continue doing this to her, not even if I survive. I break things, you know. Eventually, I break everything and everyone I touch.”

Loki chuckled, low in his throat. What was so funny? “Do I hear a challenge in there?”

Tony swallowed. “A warning, more like.”

“A _challenge_. You see, I was once told, and quite correctly as it happens, that everywhere I went there would be war, ruin and death. But I do not break easily myself.”

“Neither do I,” Tony said before he could think about it.

“My point precisely. A challenge, then?”

“Challenge. Right.”

Had they just, in some fucked-up way, agreed to … Tony closed his eyes again. No matter. He still had his doubts about whether the entire “getting rid of cancer via magic clones” would work. He’d just have to … wait. His strongest suit, of course. Wait …

 

#

 

_Hey, Pep, it’s me. I know I can’t ask anything else of you, but if you could hear me out, that’d be … that’d be very kind._

_Uhm. Well. I can’t believe it’s another message that involves “I have a lot of apologies to make” and “I can’t come home yet.” I really should broaden my repertoire of misdeeds._

_Sorry. That wasn’t funny. I just … There’ll be stuff on the news, about me. HAMMER will be trying to hide it away, but it will get out that they … they’re going to kill me. But it won’t really be me. No matter what kind of footage they show you, I promise you, I will still be alive. Just … on the run._

_I’m working to stop HAMMER, you see. And like I said, I can’t ask anything else of you, ever, but if you could … play along, that’d be fantastic. Tell the world it’s true, that I’m dead. I just want you to know that I won’t be._

_I realize that there are no excuses for what I did to you, not in that hotel and not over all those years really, so I’m not asking you to forgive me. I’ll be gone for quite a while, anyway._

_I just think that when I get back … maybe … if you want to … we can eventually be friends again. That’s how we always worked best, back when the world was comparatively simple and …_

_I miss you. That’s the bottom line, really. And if you want to, I’ll see you again. That’s it._

#

 

Tony exhaled. That recording had to count among the hardest things he’d ever done. He’d give it to Hill. Not long now.

“Loki?” he called.

“What is it?” Loki walked out of the guest room, where he’d busied himself with … something.

“All done. I’m, uh …”

Loki didn’t need pointers by now. He just got a glass of water. Tony closed his eyes. He didn’t deserve this.

“Says who?” Loki asked.

“I hadn’t meant to say that out loud,” Tony mumbled.

Loki sat down next to him on the sofa. “I should think that no one deserves to die this way. And yet, millions do. What does that tell us about the validity of the entire notion of being ‘deserving,’ I wonder?”

Tony chuckled. “You’re just saying that because deep down you don’t think _you_ deserve anything good either. What was it … war, ruin and death? Same as me, I guess.”

By some miracle, Loki didn’t seem offended. Instead, he smiled. “Well. Perhaps, then, we deserve each other.”

 

#

 

It was dark outside. Tony lay in his bed with no recollection of how he had ended up there, or what he was supposed to do next. He felt vaguely sick, but that had become such a common occurrence that he ignored it for the time being. The bed felt warm. Not the worst place in the world. His body hurt, he realized. His cancer was spreading further.

There was a knock on the door. “Tony?” came Loki’s muffled voice.

“I’m awake. Sort of.”

The door opened. Loki paused in the doorway, then approached and settled down on th edge of the bed. He extended a hand and placed it on Tony’s temple. It was so cold Tony flinched.

The hand was withdrawn immediately. “I did not mean to startle you. You are running a fever.”

“Uh …” He _was_ running a fever. “Put it back. Feels nice. Just … surprised me, is all.”

Loki obliged. He brushed some sweat-soaked hair off Tony’s face, then rested his hand there. A pleasant coolness spread through Tony’s body. It even soothed the pain a little. He exhaled in relief. Loki could help him, who would have thought. Loki could … Loki could _heal_ him.

“Okay,” Tony whispered. “Let’s go and kill me.”

Loki grinned.

 

#

 

“I should warn you,” Loki said. Behind him, Hill looked up in alarm. “I cannot accurately estimate how this will feel for you, but I strongly suspect it will be … unpleasant.”

Tony mustered a hoarse laugh. “For fuck’s sake, Loki, I’ve been feeling _unpleasant_ for months.”

“You should also be aware that you can retain control of how this duplicate of yours behaves. As you have not undergone any sort of training, you may find this difficult.”

“Yeah, whatever. Just do it.”

“Very well. Be quiet, then. I would be loath to accidentally kill you.”

That … yeah. That would be unfortunate. So Tony shut up and waited. Behind him, Hill looked very worried indeed, but did not intervene.

Loki touched his arm with those cold fingers and there it was, a foreign presence in Tony’s body, not the sick, heavy _wrong_ he’d come to associate with his cancer, more like a glide through all of his cells, icy cold, cold like death itself, razor-sharp and lethal and … oddly beautiful. It was unpleasant, yes. But it was also unmistakably _Loki_. Tony shivered.

“Close your eyes. I will work as fast as I can.”

Tony did. He could feel the magic push and pull at him, around his insides, around his liver most of all, and his lungs, where he knew his cancer had spread, Tony swallowed hard and tried not to panic when he found he couldn’t breathe properly, it would be over soon, please, it _had_ to be over soon …

Something shifted. It jolted him to the very core, like someone had reached in there and pulled his innermost out. He felt like throwing up. Was that what it felt like for Loki when he duplicated himself? That was a lot of pain to put oneself through … Tony swallowed, again. It didn’t make the sickness go away, but focusing on Loki helped, it was Loki doing this, Loki was making sure he was going to live —

One final jolt, and the magic vanished. The sudden feeling of loss made Tony stagger. Two arms wrapped around him before he could fall. “Shhh …” Loki whispered. “Don’t open your eyes just yet. Breathe, Tony. Breathe with me.”

Tony clung to Loki with whatever strength he had left, breathing in, one, two, three, and breathing out. Breathe. Breathe. Slowly, his racing heart slowed down. He felt warmer, too.

“Fucking hell.” He wanted to open his eyes, but Loki covered them with his hand.

“You will still feel sick,” Loki whispered. “That is your connection to the duplicate. I’m afraid I will have to ask you to concentrate on that, to ensure the illusion does not waver until Osborn has what he wants. But I can cope for a moment or two. Feel beyond that.”

Tony didn’t understand. He concentrated on his body, not something he’d wanted to do for a long time, and yes, the sickness was there, the constant dizziness, the fatigue, the remnants of the fever, and yet, it felt … remote. Locked up somewhere he had access to, but could also shut away. He tried to navigate around that, as if it were a box, or a house in a street, to simply bypass, aware of its existence but not entering and …

Tony gasped. Beyond, the dizziness stopped. The low creeping of sickness dissipated. He still felt too weak, too exhausted, after all this time lying in bed and not eating, but on the other side, he felt … _alive_.

“I’m not going to die.” Tony felt the laughter bubble up his throat again. This time, it did not make him sick. “I’m really not going to die!”

“No,” Loki said. “No, you’re not.”

 

#

 

Maria didn’t know whether she should be fascinated or all-out horrified. Neither did the second Tony Stark who was standing in the middle of the room, while Loki was holding the actual Tony Stark upright, whispering in his ear.

Oh, hell. This had actually worked. The duplicate looked even sicker than before. Like he was about to keel over and die right away. He didn’t move. Probably Loki had complete control over him. He’d said Stark would retain _some_ , but …

So this was the kind of magic Loki could _do_. Duplicate someone and take control of them, all without the scepter. The implications chilled Maria to the bone, more so because they apparently hadn’t occurred to Stark. Granted, this dying duplicate wouldn’t be able to do much damage, but what kind of precedent did this set? Who else could be duplicated? Who was to say Loki had not done it already?

Before her mind could take another turn for the darker, the two men disentangled themselves. Stark, to his credit, managed to stand on his own. He still looked weak and somewhat ill, but the yellow-ish glow had vanished from his skin, and when he opened his eyes … Yes, he was going to live. There had been something in the eyes, before, which had passed on to the other Stark, and which she had seen in her mother’s eyes when she’d finally visited her in the hospital. Something in the eyes of those who knew, deep down, that they were dying.

But not Stark. Not anymore. Loki had saved his life.

“Turn around,” Loki said. “Try not to be too startled.”

Stark did. He all but gaped at his duplicate. Maria imagined this to be as strange as it could get.

“Do you want back control?” Loki asked.

That … ah. That was vaguely reassuring. But it meant that Loki could definitely keep it for himself.

“I, er …” Stark sounded confused. “This is so weird, I don’t even know how I would …”

“I can teach you.” Loki smiled. “Though perhaps not today.”

Stark frowned at him. Maria just about managed to stop herself from doing the same. Of course she’d known the two of them would continue working together, HAMMER wasn’t defeated after all, but …

“Shall we proceed?” Loki asked

Stark nodded. Maria did as well, for lack of a better option. She’d have to see this through.

Satisfied, Loki looked at the duplicate Stark, who walked out of the apartment without a word or as much as a glance around. “Creepy” did not even begin to cover it.

 

#

 

Standing on top of one building of Massachusetts General Hospital with binoculars, Tony could still feel the sickness eat away at the duplicate. From outside, yes, but also … not. The longer this went on, the more surreal it felt, in a way that Tony could not even begin to describe.

He stole a glance at Loki. Back straight, chin up, hands loosely curled together, his customary pose. It spoke of concentration, though, the way his eyebrows knotted together. Huh. Tony felt a bit impressed with his attentiveness.

“There you are.” Loki nodded towards the reception area.

Indeed, the duplicate Tony was dragged over to the reception desk by whoever had found passed out a street away from the hospital. Tony could feel it, the exhaustion, the constant tiredness and, now that it was so concentrated, yes, the pain, his cancer clawing away at his insides.

The nurse frowned. In the background, someone was making a call. National newspapers, probably. HAMMER would be here soon even without Hill’s help. And all this sickness would be gone. He wavered.

“Tony.” A hand on his elbow, not steadying him exactly, because yes, he could stand upright in his own right now, just … reassuring.

“I’m good. Just got to … concentrate.”

“You’re doing fine.” More pressure on his elbow, though. Tony allowed himself to relax into it. Somehow, it helped his concentration.

“Hill,” he said as he watched the duplicate being wheeled away to a private room. “I’m in.”

 

#

 

“This is Hill, protocol Tango Sierra. I’m calling 0-1-0-9.” In other words, _I got Stark_.

Osborn had SCYTHE choppers on standby. Loki had been right. In the end, wasn’t _everything_ about Stark? Maria sighed. Well, if it got HAMMER out of the way, she would go with it. She didn’t doubt they would succeed. Two minds of the dogged determination and sheer insanity of Stark and Loki combined could probably take on the entire world if they fancied it.

And therein lay the problem. What if they did … fancy taking on the world next? There’d been no real answer to her question as to why Loki was helping Stark in the first place, or what would happen once HAMMER was out of the way. What else would Loki deem to be “in the way”? And in the way of _what_? If Stark got his assets back, or even just a decent workshop, and if Loki stuck around … Maria didn’t want to think about it, not after everything Stark had done to save the world, but … the world hadn’t exactly thanked him for it. Certainly not for Ultron. And with Loki’s poisonous voice in his ear, which wouldn’t fall on infertile ground either … Those two were more alike than Maria felt comfortable admitting.

This was her other job, then. Not just spy on Osborn. But keep an eye on Loki. And, yes, keep an eye on Stark. Sooner or later, she’d have to let the Avengers know. Natasha, and Steve. Fury, once he resurfaced. Maybe they could drag Stark out of this one-way ticket to hell. Because that’s what this was, right? A reprieve maybe, with the cancer gone, but it would come to no good.

Then Maria remembered the softness in Loki’s voice when he said Stark’s name, his first name, no less, the quiet desperation with which Stark clung to him, and the casually intimate way they had around each other, after what, less than a week together? Considering all this, Maria couldn’t think of anything, or anyone, that might stand in their way. The thought made her shiver.

“Hill?” came a voice on the secure channel. “This is SCYTHE team Two-Bravo. We’re in position.”

“I’ll be right there.”

First of all, Stark had to die.

 

#

 

It didn’t take long for HAMMER to turn up in the duplicate’s hospital room, guns at the ready, Hill in the lead.

“Let it go, Tony,” Loki said. He took his hand away, too. “Do it now.”

This wasn’t science, it was … magic. So Tony didn’t ask, _how_. He just … did. Let go. Of everything that felt sick and weak and dying inside of him. He exhaled. That was when the HAMMER guy shot the duplicate. In the chest, three times, and once in the head. Tony winced. But he hadn’t felt it. Probably instinct. It begged the question of how he actually felt. His mind boggled at the signals his body was sending him. Signals that he felt … okay?

“Good,” Hill was saying over the radio, her voice cold and functional. “Let’s get rid of the body.”

The HAMMER guys took a couple of pictures and a DNA sample. Tony wondered idly whether Hill was enjoying this, payback for everything he’d ever done to make SHIELD’s life difficult. Hard to tell, with her.

He turned around to Loki, who … didn’t look too well. His breathing was irregular, for one, and his hands clenched into fists.

“Loki?”

He held up a hand. Tony subsided. Well, he had said he’d gathered any magic he could find, so presumably this was exhausting. Certainly looked like it. In the hospital room, the HAMMER guys were placing his dead duplicate on a wheelchair, with clothes covering the wounds, and off they went. Tony fished out his phone and cracked the MGH’s surveillance system, to pass the time. There they were, advancing down the corridor. No one looked to argue with the heavily armed guys.

Eventually, the emerged from the hospital and made their way towards Lederman Park, and Charles River beyond. Tony lost track of the group in the darkness, but he figured Loki would know. So he busied himself with simple things. Such as marveling at the fact that he could stand upright by himself. He stretched his legs, almost experimentally. Oh, that felt good. He felt … good.

Beside him, Loki gasped. Tony turned just in time to grab his arm and stabilize him.

“Let go of me,” Loki hissed.

“Seriously?” Tony rolled his eyes. “Alright, I will, as soon as I’m sure you’re not going to swoon on me.”

“I will not —”

“Come here, you stubborn idiot,” Tony interrupted. “Lean on me. I can hold my own now. You know why? Oh, yeah, because you just saved my fucking life. Let me show a little gratitude here.”

Loki gave in. Probably didn’t have a choice. Tony brought one arm around his waist. Hmm. That felt good, too. To have his arms full of Loki. He smelled faintly of leather, and of snow. His hair was softer than it looked. Tony wondered whether Loki would protest any further … developments. He had kissed him once, after all, and now … To hell with it. Tony traced Loki’s spine with his right hand, applying pressure. Loki inhaled sharply, but didn’t step away. If anything, he relaxed further into Tony’s arms. Hm …

“Stark?” Hill asked via com. Tony flinched. So did Loki. “The body is gone. You can vacate the premises now.”

“Cool,” he managed. “Good job. We’ll be … on our way. We’ll be in touch.”

“You better be,” Hill said. The line went dead.

Loki disentangled himself and straightened up. He seemed improved, at least.

“You okay?” Tony still had to ask.

Loki nodded. “We should leave, yes?”

“Yeah. I’ll drive.” They’d have to get out of Boston before the media circus arrived. Hill had left them her jeep.

Tony took a deep breath of night air. Nothing hurt in his body. “So … Now that I’m dead, what do we do next?”

A languid grin stole onto Loki’s face. “We do whatever we want.”

 

#


	3. Chapter 3

They drove through the night and stopped at a motel just outside of Pittsburgh, paid in cash, no questions asked.

“I’m a dead man sleeping in motels.” Tony was still chuckling when he unlocked the door. “Life goal if I ever had one.”

Their room was hardly worthy of being called that, with a table wedged into one corner, the wardrobe in another, and a TV from the 90ies that looked ready to implode opposite the bed. One bed. A rather large bed, but Tony’s heart still leapt into his throat. He barely knew how to contain all this newfound energy surging through him.

“Are you going to stand around here all day?” Loki asked.

“Just taking in the amazing décor.” He vacated the doorway, walked over to the table and dropped their take-away onto it. “Man, I’m hungry.” Wait. He’d _meant_ that. He wanted to eat. He hadn’t felt any appetite in about forever.

“Tony?”

Loki was standing next to him, looking somewhat concerned.

“I am fine.” Tony laughed. For the first time in his life, those three words had not been a lie. He felt fine, he felt good, he felt … _alive_. On impulse, he hugged Loki. “Thank you,” he whispered. “Thank you for saving my life.”

“You are quite welcome.”

 

#

 

Maria found Osborn in his office, staring at his screen and tapping an irregular rhythm on his glass desk. Behind him, the Iron Man Mark XLIII was mounted on a workstation, partly disassembled, with bits of metal sticking out at odd angles. If Stark could see this …

“Ah, Hill.” Osborn beckoned her closer. He was grinning. “Good work. I’m just waiting for the DNA confirmation to come through any minute now. We need to be absolutely sure.”

“I agree.” Too bad Osborn hadn’t factored in Loki.

“Ah.” His mood brightened even more when he looked back at the screen. “Well, I’ll be damned. It’s definitely Stark. The bastard is actually dead. No more threats of robot armies tearing down the world and rebuilding it in his arrogant image!”

That … Stark wouldn’t … Except, he kind of had. Maria made herself smile. “I’m glad.”

“This calls for celebration!” Osborn declared. “Come with me.”

He strode out of his office, leaving her no choice but to follow. Once he’d made the short walk to the HAMMER command center and everyone had stopped their work to turn to their boss, he announced with a gleeful grin, “Tony Stark is dead.”

“Good riddance!” someone shouted. There were many hoorays and only a few frowns. Maria maintained her smile.

Whoever had commandeered the main screen pulled up Youtube highlights of Stark’s misadventures and all Maria could think of was the tired, broken man who slept curled against Loki.

In front of her, on screen, he was glaring into the camera. “My name is Tony Stark and I’m not afraid of you.”

He probably wasn’t afraid of Loki, either … Maria swallowed the lump in her throat and collected herself enough to recount some of her personal favorite Stark fuck-ups.

 

#

 

The cheeseburger was almost cold and tasted a bit like cardboard, but it still struck Tony as the most delicious thing he’d ever eaten. Once they’d recovered more cash, maybe they could buy some other food, though. He could use a beer, too. He could do anything now. He felt giddy with excitement.

“We should check the news,” Loki said. “They might have caught on already.”

Well. Apparently, excitement would have to wait.

“Yeah. Sure.” Tony got up and switched on the TV, marveling once more at how easy such a small action was for him now. He vowed to never take these simple things for granted again.

He stole a glance across the table as he sat back down and hopped through the channels, but Loki’s attention seemed absorbed by the TV. Okay. So Loki wanted him when he was throwing up what little he’d managed to eat, but not when he was finally healthy again?

With that came memories, all too fresh, from the months he’d spent being so sick and tired and … No. Tony squeezed his eyes shut against the too-familiar wave of nausea. _Go away_ , he told it. _You have no place in my life anymore. You and the fucking cancer. I won._

“Tony?”

He blinked the world back into focus when fingers unwrapped his right hand which he’d clenched into a fist, so hard there were flecks of blood on his palm. He cleared his throat. “What do you want?”

“You,” Loki said. Tony’s breath caught. “Do _you_ want to let me?” He knelt down in front of Tony, raised the palm to his lips and licked the blood away. His hand was cold. A shiver of arousal ran down Tony’s spine.

“Fuck,” he moaned. “I mean, yes. Yes, I’ll let you, now. As in, _right_ now.”

“Hm. I better get to work, then.” Loki ran his hands up Tony’s thighs. Then he ground the heel of his palm against Tony’s cock and it was all Tony could do not to scream, with surprise, with delight, with desire. A couple of days ago, he hadn’t thought he would ever have an erection again, let alone …

Loki made short work of belt and everything, and before Tony could do as much as blink, there was a hot mouth around his cock and fuck. His fingers dug into Loki’s hair in the desperate need to hold on to something, too roughly probably, but Loki didn’t seem to mind. Apparently, they didn’t have gag reflexes on Asgard. Tony groaned. It had been so long, too long …

In the back of his mind, the absurdity of the situation registered. He was in a dingy motel room, CNN was running in the background, the chair pushed uncomfortably against his back, it was a far cry from any fantasies he might have allowed himself and it was _perfect_.

When the mouth was withdrawn, Tony almost whined. He blinked down at Loki, on his knees, as he licked his lips and knocked the breath straight out of Tony.

“Well.” Loki’s voice was hoarse. “Much as I would like to continue this … would you like to fuck me?”

“Hell yes.”

Loki gave him the most gorgeous smile, rose to his feet with more grace than he had any reason to still be capable of, and offered a hand up. Tony took it and staggered to his feet, but Loki didn’t move in to steady him. He didn’t have to, anymore, Tony realized as he found his balance. He could walk unaided, now. He could …

“You,” he growled. “Bed. On your back. Now.”

Loki grinned. “As you wish.”

Clothes were shed on the way. Loki lay back on the ghastly flower-patterned bedspread, all pale skin and beautiful and Tony had to pause for a moment to process the view. When Loki beckoned him closer, though, he obeyed and climbed on top.

As Tony ran his hands across lean muscles, he became only too aware of how emaciated he still was, how gaunt his skin looked, traces of the disease all over his body and —

Loki’s hands paused on his hips, too narrow, too — “Is something wrong?”

Tony swallowed hard. He looked down at Loki. His body shuddered with want, that treacherous body of his, and … His arms couldn’t support him any longer, so he rolled over, onto his back, next to Loki, not quite touching. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”

“Do you wish me to stop?”

“No! Don’t stop, I just …”

Loki sat up. His hair was a bit of a mess, the TV lights flickered across his skin in an incomprehensible pattern and Tony wanted him so much he couldn’t breathe.

“Oh, Tony,” Loki whispered, but didn’t touch him again. “You are the most infuriating, most insane, most _brilliant_ person I have ever met and I wanted you the moment I first laid eyes on you. I can wait a little longer.”

Tony stared at him, utterly and completely speechless for once in his life. Loki held the gaze. What could one possibly say to that?

“Uh … didn’t you throw me out of a window?”

Loki smiled. “I said ‘insane,’ did I not?”

Fuck. Tony heaved himself into a sitting position, crawled into obliging arms and buried his face in the crook of Loki’s neck, all shaking and desperate and, yeah, probably insane. “I do want you. It’s just …”

Loki’s breath felt hot on Tony’s neck. “I know.”

The embrace was still, almost perfunctory. Damn. Tony wanted this, he needed this, so why wouldn’t he let himself? “Can I … Can I still kiss you?”

He cringed at the hitch in his voice, but Loki didn’t seem to notice, or mind, he just replied by covering Tony’s lips with his. Mhmm. Loki’s tongue licked across Tony’s lower lip and he opened his mouth, greedy again for more. Loki kissed him deeply, tenderly, with relish, like … like he’d been starving for this for years. Tony reached up, buried his hands in Loki’s hair again and kissed him back with everything he had. Loki shuddered against him and yeah, it was Tony making him do that, despite all his mistakes and all the devastation he’d caused and the stupid cancer and it felt _so good_.

His arousal made a welcome return, too. Maybe he hadn’t fucked this up beyond repair yet. It took him some time until he could make himself break the kiss, though.

“Loki,” he rasped.

“Anything,” came the breathless reply, “Anything you want, just say the word.”

“Uhm …” he said, suddenly and inexplicably … shy? Oh for fuck’s sake. He was _Tony Stark_. He wasn’t _shy_. So. He reached down and wrapped a hand around Loki’s cock. Loki _keened_. Hah. Tony leaned forwards and kissed him again, reveling in every shiver and every gasp he could elicit.

“I could still fuck you, like this?”

“You,” Loki gasped, “are _unbelievable_.”

Tony decided to take that was a compliment, even though Loki disentangled himself, slid off the bed and rummaged around their bags, until he found some lotion.

Anticipation stirred. Tony sat up properly and leaned back against the headboard. When Loki climbed back onto the bed and gave him a once-over, he almost didn’t cringe. Loki was smiling, though, as he moved to straddle Tony’s lap and kissed him once more.

But Loki’s hands were otherwise occupied, stretching himself open. Tony’s breath caught, before he managed to protest, “Hey. I can do that.”

“Next time.” Loki arched into his own touch once more, then withdrew his fingers. “I would rather like this to go a somewhat respectable distance.”

The implications of that, of how much Loki apparently wanted him, made Tony dizzy for a moment. Damn. That disease had really screwed his self-image.

“Oh you’re worried?” he asked. “I think we’re way past embarrassment, honey.”

“Call me by a pet name again and I will rip out your vocal cords.”

Which Loki, of course, would be eminently capable of doing. But he was grinning as he said it.

Tony grinned back. “Aw, but why would you want to deprive yourself of my lovely voice? Don’t you want to hear me scream?”

“You make a good case. That is precisely what I want.” With another cheerful grin, Loki lowered himself on Tony’s cock.

Tony’s fingers clawed into the sheets. Fuck, that felt _good_. And tight. There was _no way_ this wasn’t hurting Loki. But again he didn’t seem to mind.

“Loki. _Move_. I don’t care what else you —”

He did move, one languid roll of his hips, taking Tony even deeper. Tony couldn’t even curse anymore, he had no air left in his lungs. It might not be Loki who should worry about this not taking a lot of time …

Tony released a shuddering breath. “More,” he managed.

“All in good time.”

Way too coherent. Tony placed his hands on Loki’s hips and moved himself, as well as he could. Loki moaned, low and guttural. A flush crept all across his pale skin.

“Give me _more_ ,” Tony demanded. Pleaded. They were past that, too. He leaned forward and kissed Loki, hard.

Loki groaned, but he obliged. Tony lost himself in the rhythm, then, meeting Loki halfway each thrust, effortlessly in sync, like he’d been waiting for years himself to do this, like his entire _life_ he’d —

His right hand had found its way onto Loki’s cock again, and fuck, if he had _known_ , he would’ve done this sooner, right there in his Tower, or he’d have developed some inter-realm teleporter, hunted Loki down and done exactly this, on the golden throne of Asgard … but this was what they had now, and still had no intention of losing.

“Are you done waiting yet?”

Loki gasped, or maybe it was a curse, but he did give in. It took every last ounce of Tony’s self-control to hang in there as Loki’s body shook above him. Finally, Loki slumped against him, like his entire strength had deserted him. Not bad. Tony raked one hand down Loki’s spine.

Loki kissed him, then, still short of breath, in a messy, perfect tangle of lips, before he straightened up somewhat, brushed a sweaty tangle of hair off his face, and picked up his rhythm again. Faster, more determined. The back of Tony’s head hit the wall, but even that sharp pain couldn’t stop the orgasm that crashed through his body, so hard and visceral he thought he might pass out from it. Then he just stopped thinking altogether. He might have screamed, though.

 

#

 

Once Maria had managed to wrench herself away from the impromptu victory celebrations, her to-do-list hadn’t even hit rock bottom. She was standing in front of the apartment still inhabited by one Pepper Potts. In her hands, she held a flash drive. Stark had given this to her, before they’d gone off the the MGH. “Can you pass that on to Pepper?” he’d asked, eyes downcast. “Tell her … tell her something.”

She’d almost protested, but the hitch in his voice had given her pause. “Please,” he’d said. “You’re the super spy, you’ll think of something. You’re her friend.”

So here she was. About to tell Pepper … something. Well. Putting it off any longer surely wouldn’t improve the situation, so she rang the bell.

“Hi,” she told the intercom. “It’s Maria. Sorry for the short notice, but I’ve got a message for you.”

The door slid open. Pepper was waiting in the hallway, impeccably dressed as ever, head held up high. She’d picked herself up after Stark had left, of course she had. Maria didn’t know how exactly that break-up had gone down, but it couldn’t have been pretty.

When Pepper saw Maria, though, her face fell. “Is …” She swallowed. “Is he dead?”

“No,” Maria hastened to say. Stark had probably thought he was protecting Pepper by taking his terminal cancer away from her, but she must have known. “No, he’s not dead. He, uh … he gave me a message for you, if you … if you want to hear it.”

There was only a brief moment of hesitation before Pepper held out her hand. It was shaking, ever so slightly. Maria put the flash drive into it and Pepper’s fingers closed over it.

“I, uh …” _You’re her friend_.“I’ll be in the living room if you need me.” With that, Maria fled the scene. She could hear Pepper make her way over to the bedroom while she settled down on the sofa. There was a pile of paperbacks next to it, but Maria felt unable to concentrate. Instead, she just stared out of the window. Nice view. Not as spectacular as Avengers Tower, of course, but … it would do.

Some time passed until Pepper walked out of the bedroom and slumped into the seat across from Maria. Her eyes were red. Maria swallowed.

“How is he, now?” Pepper asked, her voice quivering.

Maria had anticipated the question, but she still didn’t know how to answer it. _He was dying of cancer and now he might be dying of recklessness. He will make mincemeat out of Norman Osborn. He’s in love with Loki. He …_

She settled for, “He’s better.”

 

#

 

“Ah, Mr Stark.”

Tony frowned at the doctor sitting behind an oppressive mahogany desk. How had he ended up here? The doctor looked vaguely familiar, but he didn’t belong into a clinic. If this even was a clinic. Behind the doctor hung a large, dark picture of a Leviathan coming through a wormhole. Tony flinched.

“What should be done with him?” the doctor asked. The scene changed to Sokovia, but decades ago, missiles hailing down on the twins’ home. Missiles imprinted _Stark Industries_.

Bile rose in Tony’s throat. “I don’t know. I tried —”

“I don’t think that’s true.” The doctor slammed a dark bottle onto the desk, for emphasis. “I think you have some very definite ideas about what should be done with Danny and I’d like to know what they are.”

The picture flicked to Avengers Tower, only it read _Oscorp_.

“What?” Tony frowned. “Who’s Danny?”

The doctor grinned. He reminded Tony of that one actor from that Kubrick movie … “You think ‘maybe’ he should be taken to a doctor?”

He pushed the bottle across the table. Scotch. Tony’s throat was dry. _The Shining_. That was the movie. He could use a drink. But that grin _wasn’t_ Jack Nicholson. Not quite. That grin … that was Ultron.

Tony woke with a start. _A dream_ , he told his racing heart. All of it, just another nightmare. The cancer, the liquidation of his company, even Ultron …

He was sitting upright on a rather uncomfortable bed, he realized. In a motel room. Right. Not a nightmare. Just his life.

How had he got here? There’d been Loki, and … Fuck. He couldn’t have dreamed _that_ , could he? Loki’s touch tingled on his skin, Loki’s kiss, and … Tony forced himself to exhale. Yeah, that had happened.

Speaking of whom, where _was_ Loki? Tony looked at the other side of the bed, but found it empty. No sounds from the bathroom, either.

A now-familiar cold settled on Tony’s mind. Loki had told him, though. _I wanted you the moment I first laid eyes on you_. Well. Loki had wanted, and Loki had received. It figured that Loki had left after. Tony had done the same to countless people. But still. It stung.

Looking on the bright side, his health had been restored. That gave Tony a fighting chance against Osborn, even without Loki. Not a bad deal, at the end of the day.

He felt around for his phone. His hand touched paper. Frowning, he picked up the folded note. Two lines in flowing longhand.

_Some urgent matters require my attention. I will return soon. L._

“Bastard,” Tony mumbled.

 _Coffee_ , his still-foggy brain suggested. Food. Supplies. Shower first. The rest could wait. Tony found a pen, wondered briefly when he’d last written anything by hand, scrawled _same here_ beneath the note and dragged himself out of bed.

 

#

 

Part of Tony wanted to take as much time as possible in getting those supplies, but then he didn’t dare expose himself to the public for longer than strictly necessary even with a hood pulled over his head and thick glasses to hide behind. The convenience store around the block was almost empty, but he was supposed to be dead.

He was back in the motel within twenty minutes, but when he opened the door, he found Loki sitting cross-legged on the bed. Meditating, or something. Tony’s breath caught, deep in his lungs. He felt relieved, yes, but most of all he remembered how good those lips had felt on his.

Loki opened his eyes and smiled. “Tell me you got breakfast.”

“Sure.” Tony held up a bag from the diner across the road. His hand shook only a little. “What have you been up to?”

“You might want to think of it as ‘recalibrating’ my magic.” Loki rolled his shoulders. It made him grimace. “The effects can be somewhat hazardous to by-standers. Hence, my absence.”

“Right. Still, I should probably get you a phone, or something.” Tony put all purchases down on the table, pushed one coffee (black, two sugars) and one donut across and started unpacking, if only to have something to do with his hands. So the magic was returning. That meant … “When are you going to leave?”

Loki slid off the bed and walked over to the table as well, but stood at a respectable distance. “Do you wish to be alone?”

Tony shuddered. “Fuck no. I can’t be trusted, after all. I don’t trust myself to …” _to not do anything terrible, by accident, or by meaning well_. “Never mind. So, anyway, you said you’re not going back to Asgard, fine, whatever floats your boat, but I don’t get what you expect from Earth. There’s still no throne here.”

“I know.” Loki smiled. It wasn’t entirely pleasant. “I was told, once, by someone who should know, because if there _was_ a throne, it’d be him sitting on it.”

“What?” Tony set some crackers down on the table with rather more force than necessary. He decided to ignore that last bit for the sake of his sanity. There were more pressing concerns. After all, this was still … Loki. “Hang on, then what do you think you’re going to do here? You’re certainly not going to kill innocent civilians. Not on my watch.”

“I do not believe in innocence. But if that is your wish, fine, we will do without. Any other … rules?”

Trust Loki to make that sound dirty. Trust Loki to … well. “Am I supposed to just take your word for that?”

His word and a highly amused grin, apparently. “As I have mentioned, I enjoy a challenge.”

“You’re not going to kill civilians because that makes it more of a _challenge_?”

“Yes. It is a mutually desirable outcome, is it not?”

Frowning, Tony nodded. He supposed it was, yes. In some strange, Loki way of logic, it even made sense. That admission probably didn’t bode well for _Tony’s_ logic, but he could work with this. “Okay. No dead Avengers, either. No mind control. No magic at all without warning me. No invasions. And absolutely no thrones. How’s that for a challenge?”

Loki reached for his coffee and took a sip. It made him smile. “Sounds simple enough. Is that all?”

“Yeah. I think so.” Tony busied himself with unpacking the supplies again. Beneath a package of blueberries and some crackers, he found a bottle of scotch. Huh. He couldn’t even recall buying that. Must have been the auto-pilot. Well, his liver was as good as new now, but … _Medicine_. He swallowed hard. “Do _you_ have any rules?”

Loki looked at the bottle, and back at Tony. “No,” he said. “None whatsoever.”

Tony’s left hand tightened around the bottle. The trembling in his fingers worsened. “Not going to stop me from drinking this with a verbose speech on the preciousness of life and how I should not waste the gift you have bestowed on me?”

Loki shrugged. “You are a grown man.”

“After all the shit you put up with, the cancer and everything, you seriously don’t care if I start drinking again?”

“Do _you_ care?”

What was that supposed to mean? “I just want a drink.”

Another shrug from Loki. “Of course you do. You will _always_ want a drink. That is why they call it addiction, Tony. Or was that dependency?”

Ouch. “I’m not …”

Loki just looked at him.

Tony glanced at the bottle. It was calling to him. How much was one drink going to hurt, anyway …

 _Dependency_.

With deliberate care, he put the bottle down, prised his trembling fingers off it and looked back at Loki. The desire, the need for scotch burned in the back of his throat. “Can you … can you get rid of that for me?”

“Certainly.”

Loki put his coffee down, got up and grabbed the scotch, all in one flowing motion. Then he was gone.

Tony’s fingers dug around the edge of the table. He concentrated on breathing until the door opened again. He straightened up, prised his whitened fingers away and turned around.

Within an instant Loki was in Tony’s personal space and kissing him again, kissing like he fought, with dirty tricks and darting movements, relentlessly, his hands were cold but it felt ah so good. Who cared about rules, really.

It took Tony some time to disentangle himself. The acute craving for a drink had subsided. He grinned at Loki. “So. Breakfast?”

 

#

 

TONY STARK DEAD, CONFIRMS OSBORN.

Various talk show people were debating his legacy, whether between the weapons and Ultron, he had done enough. People were trying to get a hold of Steve. People were camping outside Pepper’s door in New York. Osborn was saying, “America has lost one of her most brilliant, but also most troubled sons …”

It was Loki who turned it off. “Well. That part appears to have gone to plan. Perhaps we should discuss our next steps?”

 _Has he done enough?_ No. He never had. He never would.

Tony sighed. “Kill Osborn, get my assets back, found a new company called Stark Resilient and devote everything I have to curing cancer. Will that be enough? You tell me. I have no idea anymore.”

“It strikes me as a reasonable course of actions, albeit with some gaps in the plan. But you do not sound convinced yourself.”

“How do you do it?” Tony gestured made a vaguely all-encompassing gesture. “You’ve lived for what, a thousand years already? You know how this works. If I cure cancer, people will die of something else. If I try to protect the world, there’ll be the next more advanced alien race bent on wiping us all out. Nothing will ever be okay, let alone perfect, in the whole fucking universe. I mean, what’s the point?”

“What is the point to any life at all, you mean.” Loki chuckled. “I cannot answer that for you.”

“No, but you must have an answer for yourself, right?”

“That I do.”

“Well, are you going to tell me?”

Loki kissed Tony’s temple, just a fluttering touch of his lips. “Why would you strive for perfection? A perfect thing cannot change, cannot evolve, cannot live - and where is the fun in that?” Another kiss. “The universe is not perfect. But it is beautiful. Beauty is the fading Aurora on Jötunheim or the flickering lights of your Midgardian metropolis at night. Exploring a spell so complex and deadly it could make you weep. A crystal-clear line of poetry that reveals itself in stages. Beauty is the way your eyes light up when you talk about your technology, the soft tremor in your body when I kiss you, the taste of your skin and the way you say my name. I would stay alive for centuries, just to hear that one more time.”

Tony blinked. “What the hell, Loki.”

“Say it again. Say my name.”

“ _Loki_.” It wasn’t really what he had meant to say, but it would serve.

 

#

 

While she was listening to Osborn drone on about some chemical or other, Maria contemplated ranking her top concerns at the moment. The reactions Osborn was describing reminded her too much of Erskine’s serum for comfort. That, and she hadn’t heard from Stark in forty-eight hours, despite his apparent demise making the headlines. If he didn’t call by midnight, she would leave Osborn to build his own super-soldiers and go find Steve, whatever it took.

Something flickered in the situation room. Not the lights, more like … the air? Static, perhaps. But it made Maria want to reach for her gun. Looking around, she wasn’t the only one, although most of the twenty-odd people present were R&D.

The lights dimmed. Even Osborn stopped talking. The lights went out for a second, and when they came back up, Loki Laufeyson was standing in the middle of the room. Shit.

Maria trained her gun on him only half out of concern for keeping her cover. Half a dozen other HAMMER agents had also trained their weapons on Loki. He, as ever, seemed unfazed. He even held up his hands before he started laughing. Some of the researchers backed away.

“You,” Osborn snapped. “What is the meaning of this!”

Loki turned to him. “Well. Your security system evidently needs work. I could also tell you that while I approve of carbon fiber for those surveillance drones, you really should consider 3D-printing them to reduce spending. But all of that is low profile, is it not?” Loki grinned. Exactly that manic grin that had haunted Maria’s nightmares.

“And what kind of _high_ profile information can you offer?” Osborn said, in a breathless voice of anticipation.

“You will offer me access. And I will offer you a very real, very alive Tony Stark.”

 

#


	4. Chapter 4

Tony hadn’t known when to expect Loki back after they’d driven to a safehouse in Baltimore and he’d taken off to HAMMER, so it was a pleasant surprise to find him in the kitchen the next morning. Or he would have been, if Tony had been properly awake.

“Uhm. Better not talk to me until —”

A cup of coffee hovered into his hand. Tony inhaled the familiar scent, took two deep swallows, and only then allowed himself a grin. “How are you even _real_? How do you do it?”

Loki grinned back. He was hunched over that disgustingly sweet muesli he insisted made for a good breakfast. “Is it working?”

“Can’t you tell?” Still shaking his head, Tony settled down at the opposite side of the table, where a pile of toast was waiting for him. “How’d it go in Scumbag Central?”

“Splendidly. As one would expect. They’re 3D-printing the drones now. Or they would, if they had sufficient time left to produce them.”

Tony chuckled. “Too bad. So, tell me, what’s Osborn focused on that we can get him with?”

Loki produced a file and pushed it across the table. “Apart from your suits, this is what you will find most familiar, I believe - a certain serum.”

Uh-oh. Tony opened the file. With a pang, he realized how badly he wanted to talk to Bruce. Who was still MIA. _Focus_ , he told himself. “Looks like he’s working on reproducing Erskine’s formula. Not surprising, I suppose. Lots of people tried, but …” He frowned at the page he’d just turn over. “Is that the Extremis virus?”

“What is that?” Loki asked.

“It’s, er, it makes people stronger, and fast-tracks their healing, but it’s extremely unstable and … I’ve heard rumors Hydra is working on it as well. Maybe Osborn got his hands on that, or maybe he is with Hydra … Fuck.” Tony wanted to hit something. “Stern. Of course. Senator Stern. He got arrested with the whole Hydra shebang, Osborn must have bailed him out in return for a favor, and that's what he wanted, the Extremis, that just fucking figures, or maybe …”

“Will it work?”

Tony flipped through the rest of the pages. “No,” he concluded. “Not in the way Osborn wants. They’ve stabilized Extremis, yes, but the side effects …”

“Augmented strength and healing, you said?”

“Yes, but …” Tony stopped. There was something off with Loki’s tone. “It, er … it wouldn’t have cured cancer. I don’t think.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “You. Don’t. Think.”

“Not in the long term. Like I said, the side effects are still …” He trailed off.

“There are possibilities, you realize.”

Tony shook his head. “Not within the laws of physics. I gave this virus a fair amount of thought a couple of years ago, I kind of had,” _another debt to pay, another demon to exorcise_ , “Well, anyway. It’s not worth it.”

“Perhaps not. At least, not within the laws of _this_ _realm_.”

“Wait you don’t mean —” The way Loki tensed suddenly made Tony stop mid-sentence. “What?”

“Come on in,” Loki called. “It’s cold outside.”

He looked at Tony as if to say, _Well, get the door_. Tony frowned. Who was out there? He should probably check, before… ah, whatever. He activated the door.

It opened and in came …

“Maximoff?”

Indeed, it was the Avengers’ very own Scarlet Witch who stumbled into the apartment and promptly fell to her knees. “What have you … done?” she gasped.

“You’re asking me?” Loki walked over to her. Slightly alarmed, Tony followed. “If you wish to enter someone else’s mind, try not to leave the back door open.”

Maximoff glared at him, but was choking too much to reply.

“Loki …” Tony tried, now _definitely_ alarmed. “Remember what we said?”

“No dead Avengers, yes, very well.” He released whatever hold he had on her. Maximoff drew a shuddering breath. “Though I have to confess, her mind is rather entertaining. The ways she wishes to make you suffer, the staggering amount of hatred she feels towards you … quite remarkable.”

“Uh-huh.” Tony didn’t find that remarkable at all, or even surprising.

“Now, Witch. Where is the rest?”

“I’m right here,” came a familiar voice from the doorway.

Loki grinned. “Why, hello Captain Rogers.”

Oh, fuck.

 

#

 

“Alright, Hill, you were right about one thing at least,” Steve said.

Maria swallowed. She should have insisted the rest of the Avengers, such as they were, came along, but she’d had a hard enough time convincing Steve of her story. Though she had to admit, “Stark faked his own death and now he is working with Loki, apparently of his own free will,” still sounded odd to her, too.

“Wanda, are you alright?” Steve asked.

“Yes,” she ground out, still on the floor.

“Some water, perhaps?” Loki asked, his smile sickly sweet.

“I would never drink anything you offer,” she said. Fair enough.

“Something stronger, maybe,” Maria intervened. “To calm everyone down. Yes?” If anything, Stark could be relied upon to have a well-stocked bar. He did tense at the suggestion, though. Well, it had given him cancer …

“Ah,” Loki said. “That puts us at a slight disadvantage. This safehouse has been rather neglected and is thus regrettably devoid of any alcohol.”

Stark frowned. Then he looked at Loki, who shrugged. Stark nodded with something akin to … gratitude? Communicating non-verbally already?

“Enough of this,” Steve snapped. Then he turned to Stark. “You’re not dead.”

“Very observant of you,” Stark said. “Good to know our taxes aren’t wasted in terms of army training, eh?”

“And you,” Steve all but shouted at Loki, “what are you doing here? And what did you do to Tony?”

Now Stark just looked panicked. Maria hadn’t told the Avengers about the cancer, though. Not yet.

“I’m not at liberty to say,” Loki replied. That gratitude from Stark again.

“Not at … Tony! What’s going on here?”

“Uhm … HAMMER? Norman Osborn? Evil organization trying to take over the world that has to be stopped? Any of that ring a bell?”

Steve was seething. Maybe calling him had been a mistake. It had taken Stark no time at all to get under his skin, in a way no one else seemed to be able to do. Stark, Stark, always Stark. Maria was glad he wasn’t dying painfully of cancer anymore, yes, but sometimes, she wished he would just … stop. Stop meddling, stop trying to control everyone despite protestations that Steve was the boss, stop trying to _fix_ everything.

“Loki sold you out to HAMMER,” she said. Time to get that out in the open.

She might have expected disbelief, or questions, or Stark finally, _finally_ coming to his senses, but what he did instead was tip his head back and laugh. What the …

“You bought that? My, Loki, you must have been good.”

“Why, naturally.” Loki grinned. “Osborn might not have been in need of much convincing, what with real power at his fingertips, plus the tantalizing opportunity to kill Tony Stark himself …”

“But you, Hill,” Stark said, “I expected better from you.”

“Wait, I didn’t —”

“He was sick,” Wanda interrupted. She was back on her feet, at least, and still glaring at Stark. “He was dying and Loki made it go away.”

“What?” Now Steve just looked stunned.

“Thanks for that, Maximoff.” Stark swept her an ironic bow. “Yes! Newsflash from last week! I was dying. Liver cancer, in case you were wondering, it was, how can I describe it, ah … inoperable for one, alcohol damage, you see …”

“Don’t forget ‘metastasizing’ and ‘terminal’ for maximum effect,” Loki supplied, with a grin.

“Exactly! What he said. Nasty shit, in yet other words. But all gone now. Thanks to the wonders of magic medicine.”

This was Stark in full-force performance mode, Maria realized. And there was no reasoning with his public persona. Especially not now that he’d found someone to play off, someone who went along with his antics effortlessly.

“Steve,” she tried, “I’m sorry, I should have told you.”

“Damn right you should have,” he snapped. Maria found she did feel terrible about that, Stark’s privacy or not.

But Captain America on a rampage wasn’t easy to stop either. “So, what, Loki saved your life?”

“Yep,” Stark said. “And now we’re going after HAMMER.”

“I don’t buy it. This is still Loki! What the hell is he even trying to accomplish here?”

Loki grinned. “As it happens, I want to _live_. And I would burn the Nine Realms to the ground to ensure that Tony is there by my side.”

Right. Everyone stared at Stark.

“What the …” Steve looked … disappointed?

“You done interrogating?” Stark asked, seemingly unaffected. “Because, if you don’t mind, we’re a little busy right now.”

A low chuckle from Loki, while Steve transitioned from disappointment to downright disbelief. “Damnit Tony, have you even heard a _word_ of what he just _said_?”

“Hm? Oh, that. Yeah, well, I love him too, you know.”

Deafening silence descended onto the room. Even Loki seemed a little surprised.

“But … but you can’t trust him!” Steve spluttered.

“With what, my life?” Stark grinned. “I already have.”

“What if he decides to go after the Avengers again, conquer Earth, what then?”

“I won’t,” Loki said, with quiet certainty.

“Why should I believe you?”

Loki shrugged. “Tony said no thrones.”

“Stop it, Steve,” Stark intervened. “I’m serious. I appreciate the worry and all, but it’s not necessary. I got this. We got this. And we’ll have Osborn, too, as soon as you find it in yourself to allow us.”

“And can we trust _you_ ,” Wanda said, “to come up with a plan that won’t involve destroying the world?”

Ouch. Low hit, but, unfortunately, a valid point. For a moment or two, even Stark wavered. “Well,” he said, slowly, “I will use an extremely lethal screwdriver to build a micro chip that can turn actually lethal once it’s inserted in the Iron Man suit Osborn’s got in his office. Hill, you could slip that in, right?”

“I suppose,” she said. Better not give any affirmations now.

“And while that happens, we’ll work on the serum and anything else he’s developing, for back-up, and then we’ll draw him out based on the contact Loki has established, and then we’ll kill him. Easy.” Stark grinned.

“And what happens to HAMMER in your grand plan?” Steve asked.

“All yours, Cap. Don’t you need some sort of organizational support? One you could shape as you wished, at that?”

Now Steve was wavering. It was almost painful to watch, how much he wanted to trust Stark. Maria was surprised to find she could emphasize. Despite Ultron.

“Oh come on Steve,” Stark said. “I solemnly swear I’m not going to destroy the world.”

Steve’s gaze shifted over to Loki, who held up his hands. “Tony said no invasions, either.”

“Alright,” Steve concluded. “Alright, _fine_. Let’s deal with Osborn. And then we’ll deal with you.”

Loki grinned again. “At your service, Captain.”

 

#

 

It took the better part of the day to plan, i.e. reassure Steve. In some way, Tony didn’t feel too annoyed. After all, and despite everything, Steve worried about him. And about the world, but well. The “they’re going for Erskine’s formula, oh, and did we mention they’re backed by Hydra” card always worked.

The one thing Tony had no interest in was the future of HAMMER’s existing infrastructure and how much of it could be made useful to the Avengers. A lot, probably, if taken off-grid, and now that the mood against superheroes might start to swing back into their favor … But here was the elephant in the room: that favor might return only because the Avengers weren’t tainted by the association with Tony Stark anymore, the culprit in all things Ultron. After all, Tony Stark was dead. And would have to remain so. But no one mentioned this again.

Finally, Steve and Maximoff took off to brief the rest of the Avengers. Tony noted they didn’t disclose the location. Ah well. Hill agreed to stay, so she could take the chip back with her, but even she went to “get some air.”

Which left Tony alone with the meager toolkit this safehouse contained. Another bad oversight on his part. This would have taken five seconds in his workshop, with Jarvis assisting.

When he was done, he rolled his shoulders and noticed that he should probably eat. It was dark outside, too. Late. Food. Good idea. So he made his way over to the kitchen, which led him past the living room, where he found … Loki.

Oh. Right. He wasn’t alone. Tony swallowed. _I love him, too, you know_. Not the worst thing he’d ever blurted out in the heat of the moment, but …

“Uhm. Hey. Fancy some dinner?”

Loki opened his eyes. “Is the chip completed to your satisfaction?”

They weren’t going to talk about that, were they? Fine with Tony. “Yeah. What have you been up to?”

“I’ve been chasing an idea.” Loki leaned back in the cushions, but he winced at the pain in his shoulders.

Without really thinking about it, Tony stepped behind the sofa, put his hands on Loki’s shoulders and started to massage.

Loki all but moaned. “You have … very skillful hands.”

“Thanks. You can repay the favor later if you want, my shoulders are killing me, too.” It was a little hard to concentrate when Loki’s lean body was melting beneath his hands, but needs must. “So, what idea?”

“The, ah … Wanda Maximoff. She is a rare talent. The way she tried to get into my mind, it was quite intriguing. It reminded me of some … shall we say, experiments. She might have given me a way to make them work.”

“Uh-huh. Make what work, exactly? I’m guessing it’s not just a cheap party trick.”

Tony’s fingers loosened a knot that unlocked a fair few muscles down Loki’s back. This time, he did moan.

“No,” he managed, nevertheless. “It’s, ah … yes. There. Don’t stop.”

“Tell me.” Tony applied more pressure.

“Control,” Loki gasped. “Mind control.”

“What?” Tony’s hands stopped of their own accord. “You can _do_ that? Without the scepter?”

“I might, now.”

Right. That … that didn’t sound like something Loki should be allowed to do. “Where’s the catch?”

“It would only work for about fifteen minutes. Half an hour, perhaps, if I’m well rested. Only for short distances. And while I am reasonably certain that it would work, I do not know for sure. It is a delicate process, to work inside someone’s mind, while not blocking it out, still allowing them access to their knowledge, their mannerisms …”

“Fucking hell.” Tony resumed his massage, if only to occupy himself. “Why are you telling me all this?”

“I would not wish to break your rules. You did say, no mind control. But at least consider that it might … help with Osborn. You thought about swinging the pendulum back into the Avengers’ favor, did you not?”

Of course Loki would come up with a manipulative trick, full of deception as he was. Tony knew that. He also knew it should make him run for the hills. But …

“How do you not know for sure? Need to test it out?”

“Yes. But then I did promise not to kill any civilians, didn’t I.”

Tony closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. Opened them. “Try it out on me.”

“ _What_?”

“Well, it could be useful against Osborn, but you need to know how to use it, and you’re right, you’re not going to harm any civilians. So that leaves me. I used to test my tech on myself all the time, small miracle that never went badly wrong … well, except for Ultron, I suppose, but anyway … Yeah.”

Loki swallowed, visibly. “Do you have _any_ idea what you’re offering me?”

“No, but I’d like to find out.”

There was no reply, but Tony didn’t press the issue. It had been an offer, was all. He just continued to massage Loki’s shoulders, feeling the strained muscles ease out. He remembered how they moved, beneath Loki’s pale skin.

Then Loki spoke, just one word, so low Tony almost didn’t catch it, “Why?”

“Why not? Let’s be realistic here, if you wanted me dead, I would be dead. If you wanted HAMMER for yourself, you’d have it by now, and Osborn would also be dead. So would Hill, and Maximoff, and Steve. I doubt I’ve seen even half of what you can do, and if you wanted to break me, or use me against my will, or kill me, you’d have done all of that, and not necessarily in that order. Then there’s that possibility that you get a kick out of playing the long game, but for that, this episode would be too short, especially for someone who’ll live forever. So, I’m fairly sure you won’t harm me, or use me to cause any harm. Knowingly, at least. The rest is risk, and that’s life. If you say you’re fairly sure, that’s good enough for me. It’ll work. So. Go ahead and do your worst.”

Loki … chuckled. He got up and walked around the sofa. “Sometimes, I, too, have trouble believing you are real.”

A cold hand touched Tony’s temple. The icy slide of magic through his body, yeah, Tony knew that already. He tried to exhale. Loki’s thumb brushed across his lips.

“Hey, I hope you’re not planning on using that move on Osborn.”

“No,” Loki whispered as he leaned in. “This one’s just for you.”

Tony was kissing him before he could react himself, his body acting on its own accord … or rather, Loki’s accord. Tony could feel the magic push at him, a cold wave that swept through every nerve, ending in the hands he grabbed Loki’s arms with, and the tongue in Loki’s mouth. Right. Not a bad feeling, as such, but … Tony tried to take a step back. He couldn’t. He couldn’t even break the kiss. For a moment, Tony had a rather clear picture of exactly what he’d signed up for here. He tried to exhale, but there was nothing to exhale into. There was … nothing.

 

#

 

Maria had stayed out in Baltimore for as long as she could. She knew she had to return to the safehouse eventually, to pick up the chip, but facing Stark and/or Loki wasn’t high on her wishlist, for … oh, “forever” sounded about right.

Nothing for it, though. Who knew what those two got up to at night. She rang the bell.

Thankfully, the door opened fast. Stark appeared in the doorway and waved her in with his trademark grin. “Hey, Hill. I was beginning to think we’d lost you to the Chesapeake Ripper.”

“Give me the chip and I’m out of here.”

“Right to the chase, eh? Will you come in for a second at least? Don’t worry, I’ve got the chip right here.”

With a sigh, Maria entered the living room. Loki was sprawled across the sofa, reading. He didn’t look at her, which suited her fine.

Stark reappeared. “There you go. Your order of one destructive chip has been filled. Anything else?”

“No,” Maria said.

“Yes.” Loki rose from the sofa. “Actually, there is.”

She closed her eyes, just for a second. “Now what?”

“Did you notice anything unusual about Tony?”

“No. Why? What have you done now?”

The grin on Loki’s face made her skin crawl. He walked over to Stark and whispered something, so close his lips brushed Stark’s temple. And what had that been, surely not, “Wake up.”

“Huh?” Stark blinked. “Oh. Right. Hey, Hill.”

“What’s going on?” she asked, feeling queasy.

“It works,” Loki said.

“Told you.” Stark gave him a grin.

“You know what?” Maria snapped. Both men gave her a bemused look. “I don’t give a damn about your sick games. I’ll call you when the chip is in place, then we’ll take down Osborn, and after that, if I see either of you again, if I even _hear_ of either of you stirring up any trouble whatsoever anywhere on Earth, I will hunt you down and make you regret the day you were born.”

“Harsh,” Stark said. “But fair enough. I suppose. See you soon, Hill.”

“Safe travels,” Loki added.

Maria turned on her heel and walked out of there as fast as she could.

 

#

 

When the door had closed behind Hill, Loki chuckled. “Well, that was … interesting. But tell me - how much do you recall?”

“Not much.” Tony tried to remember what it felt like under Loki’s spell, the cold that blanketed his senses and made him surrender every ounce of control … He shifted on his feet. “But something. Broken images. It’s all a bit of a blur.”

“Hm.” Loki gave him a critical once-over. “That’s not good enough now, is it.”

Tony shrugged. “Osborn will do whatever you want, that sounds pretty good to me. And creepy. But good, for … you know. Plans.”

“Plans.” Loki came closer with a smile on his face. A predatory smile. Tony swallowed. “Enlighten me, then. Just what are your … plans?”

“My plans?” Tony felt cold. It might be the magic again. It might also be a tiny hint of … dread.

“Your mind,” Loki said, “from what I have gathered, is quite partial to subjugation. I did not expect that, given how you fended off the scepter. But I am not entirely surprised, either.”

“Oh. Right.” What on Earth was he supposed to reply to that? Judging from the way Loki was looking at him, though … and the magic that was clawing at the edge of his consciousness. “You want to fuck me, is that it?”

Something strange passed through Loki’s eyes. Where was this damn conversation going? Tony had no idea. He tried to take a step back, for experimental purposes. He couldn’t. Right. Not good. He tried to speak, but that didn’t work either. Definitely not good. He was cold. But he was also still conscious.

“Have you ever allowed anyone to do that?” Loki asked. “Let’s have a look, shall we?” Magic dug into Tony’s mind, into his memories, fast-forwarding through all the guys he’d slept with, guys who’d fucked him, twenty-odd years ago, when he’d been young and drunk and curious. Mostly drunk. The only thing that had really stuck in Tony’s head from those experiments was the pain. He shuddered. Or would have, if he had been able to move.

“Interesting,” Loki concluded. “I can see why you might be less … amenable to try that again.”

Tony swallowed. His heart was hammering. He might not be entirely opposed to the idea if it was Loki, but …

“Really, now?” Loki smirked. An icy presence in the back of Tony’s mind. Maybe he hadn’t even spoken out loud. Creepy. And ever so slightly awesome. “Who’s to say I haven’t done it already?”

Tony’s heart skipped a beat, then started to race. He still couldn’t move, couldn’t speak. But that … he would have noticed that, wouldn’t he? He’d still feel it, for one.

“Not necessarily,” Loki said. “Magic, remember? I could do it again, even.”

 _You wouldn’t_ , Tony tried to say. _Would you_?

Loki laughed. It sent a shiver down Tony’s spine. Followed by the ghosts of fingers that couldn’t really be there, that was just Loki messing with his mind, just …

The paralysis broke without warning. Tony’s knees almost gave way. He only just managed to stagger to the nearest seating opportunity, which happened to be an armchair. What the _fuck_ had that been about? He needed a few moments to regain control of his erratic breathing before he managed to look up.

Loki’s eyes were on him, contemplative. “May I touch you?” he concluded.

“Excuse me?” Tony had to laugh. It didn’t sound too hysterical. Or so he hoped. “You just said you’d fuck me while I’m under some sort of spell without any way of saying no, and now you ask permission to _touch_ me?”

“Now it works,” Loki said, more or less to himself.

“You —” Tony faltered. “Hang on, let me get this straight. This was another experiment to find out how conscious you can leave your … your subjects?”

“Why, yes.” Loki gave him a thin smile.

“Fuck.” Tony’s heart was still racing. He should be running, too. As far away from this place as possible. He didn’t move. “Couldn’t you just have … I don’t know, told me your favorite color or something and asked me about that afterwards?”

“It had to be something your mind would suppress if given half a chance.” Loki shrugged. “You wanted to know what you were offering me. There you have it. Now. May I touch you?”

Okay. He’d kind of walked into that. Loki, insanity, and all that. But … Tony swallowed. “What are you offering _me_ , now?”

“Anything you want.”

There’d been no inflection in that statement, no expectation, nothing. Tony told his racing heart to calm down. This was Loki. This was … not okay, and never would be okay, but … “Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, alright, fine, you may touch me.”

Loki walked over, leaned down and kissed him, but it was slow, intimate. Tony shivered, wrapped his arms around Loki and kissed him back. Warmth uncoiled, deep in his chest, and chased the lingering ice away, even though Loki’s hands were as cold as always.

“I have no wish to hurt you,” Loki whispered. “I would never do anything to you that renders you unable to look at me.”

Oh. That _mattered_. On some fundamental level, that was … “So I’m guessing blindfolds aren’t your kink?” Loki blinked, disbelieving. Tony rambled on, “That’s too bad really, I think that might be a great idea, I’ve got this whole repertoire of ideas, you know, now that I’m alive and will probably remain to be for some time and I want to _feel_ it, alright, because otherwise what’s the point, have you ever considered that I want you to hurt me, that I want the pain, I just need to —”

“No,” Loki said. Just that, but it was enough to make Tony stop in his tracks. “No, you don’t want the pain. You’re just so used to it.”

“I …” Tony faltered. His eyes burned. He blinked, furious with himself. And with Loki. But mostly himself.

Loki smiled. Huh. “There is no need to misdirect or protect me. From anything inside of you that makes you afraid of your own mind. You can tell me. I won’t run. I want to _know_.”

“Okay,” Tony said. The scariest thing about his mind at the moment was its blankness. “Okay. I’ll tell you, if there’s … Whatever. I, uhm …”

“What do you want?” Loki asked.

“Uh …” Tony peered into those green, darkened eyes. His heart fluttered. “You like it, don’t you? Getting fucked?”

“Yes.” Loki’s breath hitched. “I like it a lot.”

“Do you just like the pain, then? Or can it feel good?”

“It does feel good, Tony. Done properly, it does.”

Tony shivered. He was barely breathing. “Show me.”

“As you wish.”

Loki closed the distance and kissed him. Again, it was softer than Tony expected, the tender lips and the slow glide of Loki’s tongue trying to chase his lingering doubts away. What was it about Loki that made sex into such a vulnerable affair? Tony had never thought of it like that before, but now …

“Bedroom?” Loki asked.

Tony didn’t reply, just started moving towards it, and dragged Loki along, not breaking the kiss, because he couldn’t. Didn’t want to. He would just keep kissing Loki forever.

Somehow, he found himself on the bed, on his back, with Loki straddling him and dragging off both their shirts. Tony exhaled sharply as the sensation of Loki’s touch against his bare abdomen exploded through his body. Loki traced the scarred rim of where the arc reactor used to be with his fingers, then his tongue. Tony arched into the caress. Control, yes. The arc reactor had stopped Loki from getting into Tony’s mind, once. And now he’d let Loki in, just like that. _Just_ … Loki sucked down on Tony’s neck, grazed it with his teeth. _Like that_.

Loki brushed some hair off Tony’s face. The cold touch was a welcome distraction from his straining arousal. Damn those jeans. Slender fingers brushed across his lips.

“My apologies,” Loki whispered. His breath carried a whiff of ice. “Warm those up for me, will you?”

Tony opened his mouth. The fingers did feel rather cold and odd, but … familiar, too. Tony swirled his tongue around them and sucked. Loki moaned, low and guttural.

Eventually, Loki withdrew. He sat back on his heels, cheeks flushed and breath heavy and hell yes Tony wanted all of it. But Loki swallowed, once, and regained control of himself within the blink of an eye. Enviable quality, that.

“Erm …” Tony cleared his throat. “Don’t you need me on my stomach?”

“No.” Loki smiled. “I would rather look at you.” He leaned down and kissed Tony again, while at the same time working his trousers off. “Allow me?”

Tony unfolded his legs around Loki with a grin. “I’m not made of glass.”

“I know.”

Tony watched as Loki produced some lube, then stripped off the rest of his clothes and knelt back down. He smiled, leaned down and swallowed most of Tony’s cock.

“Fuck,” Tony cursed. He opened his legs further to offer better access.

Loki cupped his balls, then, rolled them a little in his palm and Tony knew, with absolute certainty, that he could come like this, and would, soon, with his body still so starved of touch, which, yeah, okay, no complaints, but didn’t they have other plans?

“Ah,” he gasped, “what are you doing?”

“Hm.” Loki withdrew with a smile. “Making you … amenable.”

“I am amenable.” Tony found a laugh in himself somewhere. If Loki didn’t put his body back on him, into him, soon … “Absolutely pliable and …” _submissive_. “Trust me.”

“Oh, but I do.” Loki crawled up and kissed him again, deep and with relish. Tony reached up, he had to touch Loki somehow, get him closer.

A lube-slicked finger was probing at his ass. Okay. That was probably going to hurt soon. Tony was a little distracted, though, with Loki’s mouth on him and —

The finger slid inside. Fuck, that … didn’t hurt, as such, but … His entire body tensed up in defense against the intrusion. It really had been some time since he’d last done this.

Above him, Loki stilled. “Am I hurting you?”

Tony swallowed. “Not really, just … give me a moment. Or two.”

“Take all the moments you need,” Loki said. “We have time, now.”

They did, didn’t they? There might be some evil maniacs to contend with, but a distinct lack of terminal illnesses certainly had improved the timescape. Not that Tony had thought far ahead into the future, but … He certainly wasn’t going to start now. Instead, he took a deep breath, and another, as he willed his body to accommodate.

“This, uh …”

“Bear with me,” Loki whispered, and leaned in for another kiss. At the same time, he did something with his finger, pushed a little deeper and changed the angle slightly, and —

Pleasure exploded in Tony’s body, in all synapses, or so it felt, his back arched off the mattress and into Loki’s solid body again, burning with electricity and energy and, “Holy _shit_ ,” Tony gasped. “That. Do that again.”

“It gets better,” Loki said. He added a second finger with that, and grazed Tony’s prostate again and okay, that did feel pretty awesome.

“Come on,” Tony ground out.

“Come on, what?” Loki was nibbling on his neck again, damn it.

“Fuck me,” Tony said. Demanded. Whatever.

“I have no wish to hurt you,” Loki repeated. He was scissoring his fingers again and Tony found himself straining back against the touch, trying to get more.

“Doesn’t matter,” he managed. “I trust you, too.”

It gave Loki pause. “You shouldn’t.”

“Yeah, no kidding.” Tony hooked a leg around Loki’s waist to stop him, should he get any ideas of withdrawing. “So fucking what. I still do. Trust you.”

Loki laughed, and twisted his fingers again. “You are incorrigible.”

“Indestructible,” Tony pointed out between gasps.

“Invincible.” With a final kiss, Loki withdrew his fingers and positioned Tony’s ankles on his shoulders for better access. “Remember that.”

Tony tried, because that probably mattered, too, but then he had Loki’s cock inside of him and fuck that _did_ hurt, but this was Loki, so, what? He didn’t know. He just cursed beneath his breath.

“Are you —” Loki tried.

“Yes, damnit, move, now.”

Loki did. He found his angle immediately and Tony could only moan, thrust back against Loki, he could get used to this, he could … he couldn’t think. Pleasure raced through his body again. There was a mouth on his lips, and then a hand on his cock, firm and in tune with the thrusts against his prostate and—

Tony’s capacities of thought caved at all that sensory input. Just as well. He didn’t want to think as the first wave of orgasm hit him. He just wanted to feel good, and he did, more than good actually, he felt alive, he lived by this and _for_ this, for Loki’s breathless moans, gentle kisses and rough touches, and for the way Loki’s eyes darkened as he came.

Through a pleasant haze, he noticed that Loki slid off him and to the side. His hand followed, and landed on Loki’s upper arm.

“Okay,” Tony managed. “You were right. It does feel good.”

Loki was struggling to breathe himself, so he didn’t reply, but he gave Tony a smile that made him wish they could do it all over again. Right now. Or at least in the future. Plans. Or something. Nevermind.

 

#

 

Hill didn’t call the next morning. She just texted. _Done_ , it read. Tony chuckled and looked across the breakfast table at Loki. “Good to go on Hill’s end. Let’s set up a meet with Osborn.”

“I will,” Loki said. “One more thing, though, before we finish this … Tell me about Ultron.”

Tony didn’t recoil, but it was a close call. “What? Why? No. You’ve seen the footage, the news … what else is there?”

“Fine, tell me something else, then. When you were dying … why was that?”

Tony frowned. “Because cancer is something us poor mortals get? Because I started drinking when I was fifteen? Because I was finally shit out of luck? Who knows. Who cares.”

“I didn’t ask why you had cancer.” Loki took a sip from his coffee. Took his time. “I asked why you were _dying_.”

The frown deepened. Where was this going? “Because it was … terminal? Look, there’s this miraculous magic thing on Earth called the Internet if you’re that interested, but —”

“So you are telling me you gave up. The great Tony Stark, engineering genius extraordinaire, gave up in the face of a disease.”

“Well, what was I supposed to do? It was inoperable, I had no resources left, nothing.”

Loki arched an eyebrow, the one that was his equivalent of, _oh please_.

“But … but it was cancer!”

“You know what I think?” Loki asked. For once, there was no trace of a grin on his face. “I think you wanted to die. You got scared in the end, as most people do, but part of you _wanted_ it. Part of you thought you _deserved_ it.”

Tony stared. He knew he had to say something, he had to deny it, he had to —

“You were right,” Loki said. “Last night. If I wanted you dead, you would be dead. I could kill you, right now. It would be no effort. And then, do you think humanity will fall because the great Tony Stark is not around to fix it? When this sun finally goes supernova and wipes out our galaxy, will that be on your head, too?”

“But …” Tony tried. But what? “I thought I was doing the right thing.”

“So did I, once,” Loki said, without inflection. “You saw how that went first-hand, in New York.”

“But you weren’t right. With New York.”

“No. I wasn’t, was I?” Loki shrugged, still devoid of emotions. “Fancy that.”

Tony was staring again, he knew. He couldn’t help it. What he didn’t know was how to get out of this. Hill’s words echoed in his mind, that warning about not stirring up any trouble again whatsoever … Because he would, wouldn’t he? Tony Stark was Trouble Incarnate. Wherever he went, there would _always_ be trouble. So, the question really was, “But what do I _do_?”

“I made sure you didn’t die, but I can’t make you _live_. You’ll have to figure that one out by yourself. All I can do now is make you an offer.”

Breathless, Tony asked, “And what is that?”

“When Osborn is dealt with, I intend to reacquaint myself with the Nine Realms and the universe beyond. Would you like to come with me?”

“What, like … in space?” Tony blinked. This conversation really wasn’t doing his wit any favors. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, that sounds all kinds of awesome, and it’s not like I’m welcome on Earth at the moment, but … why are you offering that in the first place? What do you _want_?”

At long last, Loki smiled again. “The simple answer is that my life is more fun with you in it.”

“I’m guessing there is a complicated answer as well?”

“Naturally. But that one you already know.”

Tony looked at Loki and … yeah. Yeah, he did know. “Okay,” he said. “What the hell, let’s do it. When Osborn’s dealt with, let’s go out there and hitchhike around the galaxy.”

 

#

 

They met Osborn in a shadowy corner in New York City. Maria didn’t feel comfortable sending Steve in alone, but then neither Stark nor Loki could be seen out there, according to the plan. Instead, they were keeping her company in the van.

“There he is,” Stark said. He’d hacked into HAMMER’s own surveillance drones to catch sight of his errant suit. 

Osborn landed. In an Iron Man suit. Maria glanced at Stark. He looked as if he’d swallowed something unpleasant. That, she could emphasize with. Loki put a hand on Stark’s shoulder and Stark actually leaned against him. Maria looked away, back at the monitor.

“Where’s Stark?” Osborn asked. “Do I get to take out two of you killing machines tonight?”

“Tony Stark is dead.” Steve pushed off the wall, shield in hand. “You already killed him, remember? But you won’t kill me.”

“We’ll see about that. I have to say I really like this suit. Although I rather preferred the Iron Patriot color scheme - should I take on that one? What does Captain America think?”

“Right,” Stark muttered. He was fiddling with his phone. Whatever he did made the suit power down and spill out Osborn. Phase One, complete.

“Captain America,” Steve said, “thinks that someone who collaborates with Hydra has no right to call anyone a killing machine.”

“What else would you call the mastermind of the Ultron disaster, then?” Osborn asked.

“Bit predictable, isn’t he?” Loki said. That, presumably, was Phase Two. That mind control spell he could just _do_ now. “Would you like to have a look?” he asked Stark. Maria really, _really_ needed the two of them off Earth.

“Sure,” Stark said. A moment later, he was chuckling. “Spent his childhood locked up, afraid of the dark and the monsters? Goblins? Really?”

“Indeed,” Loki said. “Shall we show him where the _real_ monsters hide?”

 _They don’t hide, do they_ , Maria thought. She kept her eyes fixed on the monitor, where Osborn was now attacking Steve as if he still had his armor on. Maybe he thought he had, with Loki’s spell on him. Steve was holding back, dodging. They needed Osborn alive.

“You Avengers,” Osborn was saying, “you think you rule the world, don’t you? You’re not above the law.”

“Easy to say for the guy who has the law in his pocket,” Steve said. “The Avengers protect the world from people like you. You haven’t even denied you’re working with Hydra! To what end?”

“Come on,” Loki murmured.

“I would say I want to rule the world,” Osborn said. “But then, I already do.”

“No, you don’t.” Steve hit him with his shield. Osborn stumbled backwards and tripped over a trashcan, which sent him flying. He scrambled to his feet. “Give it up, Osborn. You’ve done enough damage, don’t you think?”

That was Maria’s cue to signal to the CNN crew hiding on the first floor of the nearby building, filming the entire thing. The presence of a camera registered even through the haze in Osborn’s mind. His face fell.

Loki turned to Stark. “Any last words?”

Stark grinned. Presumably, Loki had given him some sort of link to the mind he still had captive, because Osborn flinched.

“I win,” Stark said.

The venomous, yet totally self-assured certainty in his voice made Maria shiver. He had won, though. Him and Loki.

Osborn collapsed into a crumpled heap. Police forces moved in and took him into custody. They thanked Steve. All in front of the cameras. This was going live to CNN, and around the world.

“Not bad, eh?” Stark looked at Maria.

She wasn’t so sure about that. “I’m going to deal with the media. And when I get back, you will be gone. Both of you.”

“Sure thing.” Stark had the audacity to grin at her. “Just send Steve my way, will you?”

Maria contemplated declining, or lying, but then Steve probably wanted to talk to Stark. “Fine.” And that, she hoped, would be the last thing she had to say on the matter.

 

#

 

“Sooo …” Tony said. “That’s that.” He looked at Loki, who gave him a smile, then to Steve, who was just entering the van. “Hey, good job out there.”

“You, too, I suppose.” Steve swallowed, visibly. “Look, Tony, don’t take this the wrong way, but I think it might be best if you were to … to …”

“To stay dead?” Tony grinned at Steve’s flinch. “Yeah, no offense taken here. I get it. Seriously, I do.”

“I was going to say, take an extended leave of absence.”

“Oh, I intend to. From what I’ve gathered, I’m going to take myself far, far away.”

“Gathered …?” Steve frowned. His gaze shifted over to Loki. “Oh God no. You’re not going with … you _are_?”

“Yep. And you’re not going to stop me.”

“But he’s … He will betray you.”

Tony could feel Loki’s eyes on him. He laughed. “So, anyway, the Avengers? It was fun while it lasted, right?”

“Will you be …” Steve trailed off. That could mean anything. _Will you be back? Will you be alive? Will you be okay?_

Tony shrugged. “We’ll see, won’t we? Give the others my best. Or something. So long, Rogers. Get out there and be a hero.”

With one final look at Loki, Steve turned and walked out, to deal with the media circus.

Tony took a deep breath. Everything he’d kind of postponed until “after we’ve dealt with Osborn” … that was now. He should probably take a moment, or several, to think this through. Long-term consequences, and all that. Right?

“Okay.” He turned to Loki. “The universe, you said? Bring it on.”

Loki’s smile was the last thing Tony saw before Earth swirled out of focus around them.

 

###

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took a bit longer than I anticipated, sorry. This is it, though! Thanks to everyone who left kudos and/or commented, you guys always make my day! 
> 
> In related news, this fic will have a sequel. Possibly several, depending on inspiration and time. I've certainly got a few more ideas. And yes, there will be other realms and mythology again ;) Stay tuned.


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